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Captain Fun

This is the strongest being in the universe. God may pray to chazi but chazi prays to Captain Fun. Captain fun lays down justice and fun to all wrong doers.
God: chazi help us

Chazi: hold on let me ask captain fun
by MemesandTrees September 17, 2020
mugGet the Captain Funmug.

Captain Kidde

Da infamous Scottish pirate-leader who made his fortune by setting fire to conquered ships and then extorting them for huge sums to bribe him to extinguish da flames.
I dunno if those puny wine-bottle-sized fire-extinguishers would be all dat effective on huge clippers or schooners dat were engulfed in flames --- Captain Kidde might have had to switch to da larger "Adultte" brand of extinguisher to properly put out said towering infernos.
by QuacksO0 May 30, 2025
mugGet the Captain Kiddemug.

Captain Flex

Dude with a slim build who sees himself as more of a Scottiah adonis body god
Usually found peacocking around the floor for no reason
Throws out a random flex when a member of the opposite sex is around
Look at BB over there peacocking round those hoes, he is the real deal captain flex
by Jonsnowknowsnowt July 27, 2016
mugGet the Captain Flexmug.

Captain Ahab

Mike is such a Captain Ahab. He banged Bertha. There she blows.
by Gore Poppins December 10, 2015
mugGet the Captain Ahabmug.

captain sarcasm

The arch-enemy of Captain Obvious, because unlike him, Captain Sarcasm just answers a stupid question with a rather crude or not sarcastic way. Or just simply states facts in a sarcastic way.
Stupid guy: "If I get bitten by a venomous spider, will I die?"
Captain Sarcasm: "No, you'll become Spider-Man."

Stupid guy: "How will my post card be delivered to my mom "by sea"?"
Cap. Sarcasm: "Swimming, obviously".

Stupid guy: "Do you need to use the bathroom?"
Cap. Sarcasm: *holding his crotch* "No, I need to go to the library and read a book".
by DiogoAttitude November 22, 2016
mugGet the captain sarcasmmug.

Captain Kyle

The alter ego of the sexiest man to ever live Kyle Johnson
“YARRRR HARRRR SET SAIL ME” said captain Kyle
by Captains cum bucket April 26, 2020
mugGet the Captain Kylemug.

Captain Wankstash

A name first used in spoken conversation when referring to the fictional character Simon from the TV series The Walking Dead, who supported an excessively flamboyant moustache and cheesy grin. This, coupled with his attempts to emulate his boss Negan and general wankerism led to the formation of the moniker.
Similar examples would be: Douchie McDouchebag; Sergeant Dickface; Lord Twat of Knobington Manor, etc, of which the original creator of the name Captain Wankstash seemingly has an endless supply.

Can also be written Captain Wankstache

Suggested use: for mustachioed military/ uniformed non-military types, with attitudes far in excess of their competence /accomplishment. Is not restricted to this use but it's a good fit for it.
Who was that guy? You know, Captain Wankstache.

Alright Captain Wankstash, calm down/give it a rest.

Here we go, Captain Wankstache is at it again.
by FecktardIntolerant May 12, 2023
mugGet the Captain Wankstashmug.

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