A chronically unaware driver who sets up shop in the left lane of any major Florida highway, treating it less like a passing lane and more like a reserved cruise control runway. Left Lane Larry doesn’t discriminate—he might be a local with a “Salt Life” decal and a sunburned arm out the window, or a snowbird tourist in a rented Altima with both hands on the wheel and a wide-brimmed hat still on indoors.
Larry isn’t actively malicious—just militantly oblivious. He ignores flashing lights, honking horns, and the visible rage boiling in his rearview mirror. But try to pass him, and suddenly he becomes offended. He’ll match your speed just enough to box you in, like it’s a personal insult that you dared attempt efficiency.
He’s the kind of guy who would quote the speed limit like scripture while doing 63 in a 70 and holding back a convoy of 17 vehicles. The moment you go around, he speeds up—not to pass anyone, just to punish you for trying.
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Common Traits:
Drives a base-model vehicle: Camry, Impala, Altima, or a beige Buick with zero visible dents (but plenty of emotional ones)
Has a college parking decal that expired in 2013
Uses cruise control as a personality trait
Turn signal is optional (and usually left on for several counties)
May sport bumper stickers like:
“I brake for butterflies”
“My other car is a prayer”
Or ironically: “Keep Right Except to Pass”
Windows always up. Volume always low. Seat leaned forward like he's landing a plane.
Larry isn’t actively malicious—just militantly oblivious. He ignores flashing lights, honking horns, and the visible rage boiling in his rearview mirror. But try to pass him, and suddenly he becomes offended. He’ll match your speed just enough to box you in, like it’s a personal insult that you dared attempt efficiency.
He’s the kind of guy who would quote the speed limit like scripture while doing 63 in a 70 and holding back a convoy of 17 vehicles. The moment you go around, he speeds up—not to pass anyone, just to punish you for trying.
---
Common Traits:
Drives a base-model vehicle: Camry, Impala, Altima, or a beige Buick with zero visible dents (but plenty of emotional ones)
Has a college parking decal that expired in 2013
Uses cruise control as a personality trait
Turn signal is optional (and usually left on for several counties)
May sport bumper stickers like:
“I brake for butterflies”
“My other car is a prayer”
Or ironically: “Keep Right Except to Pass”
Windows always up. Volume always low. Seat leaned forward like he's landing a plane.
Cop: Sir, do you know why I pulled you over?
Left Lane Larry: I was doing the speed limit.
Cop: In the passing lane. For 14 exits. With no one in front of you.
Left Lane Larry: I was setting the pace.
Left Lane Larry: I was doing the speed limit.
Cop: In the passing lane. For 14 exits. With no one in front of you.
Left Lane Larry: I was setting the pace.
by Pary Moppins July 10, 2025
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Traffic on Cape Cod in the Summer sucks, youve gotta take a Cape Cod Left turn to ever get going left on the highway
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Left Lane Jackass (LLJ): A person driving in the left lane on a highway either at the speed limit or usually slightly below the limit AND the following conditions are present: 1) Another car or cars is behind them wanting to go faster; 2) The person driving is completely unaware of his or her surroundings.
The following conditions are not necessary for the definition, but are frequently observed: There is a blinker flashing and the driver is completely unaware of it and has no intention of changing lanes, and 2) The driver may be talking on a cell phone, putting on make-up, or daydreaming.
Supporting evidence includes: The drivers behind the LLJ appear pissed off, and 2) drivers behind the LLJ are usually tail-gaiting and flashing their lights, however, this usually has no effect, due to condition #2 of the definition.
The following conditions are not necessary for the definition, but are frequently observed: There is a blinker flashing and the driver is completely unaware of it and has no intention of changing lanes, and 2) The driver may be talking on a cell phone, putting on make-up, or daydreaming.
Supporting evidence includes: The drivers behind the LLJ appear pissed off, and 2) drivers behind the LLJ are usually tail-gaiting and flashing their lights, however, this usually has no effect, due to condition #2 of the definition.
Passenger: "Hey, is there a traffic jam ahead?"
Driver: No, it's another left lane jackass.
Passenger: Just get a little closer to him, I'm sure he'll move over when he notices us.
Driver: He's frigging clueless, and doesn't even know that I'm 12 inches from his bumper. I think he's talking on his cell phone.
Driver: No, it's another left lane jackass.
Passenger: Just get a little closer to him, I'm sure he'll move over when he notices us.
Driver: He's frigging clueless, and doesn't even know that I'm 12 inches from his bumper. I think he's talking on his cell phone.
by MeDavebo September 29, 2014
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《¤》pay《¤》 attention 《¤》to 《¤》when 《¤》I 《¤》process 《¤》moving 《¤》the《¤》 left《¤》 side 《¤》of 《¤》my 《¤》body 《¤》with 《¤》my《¤》 right 《¤》lobe 《¤》and《¤》 I《¤》 will 《¤》kill《¤》 you《¤》
by LeSouffleDeVersailles March 1, 2025
Get the 《¤》pay《¤》 attention 《¤》to 《¤》when 《¤》I 《¤》process 《¤》moving 《¤》the《¤》 left《¤》 side 《¤》of 《¤》my 《¤》body 《¤》with 《¤》my《¤》 right 《¤》lobe 《¤》and《¤》 I《¤》 will 《¤》kill《¤》 you《¤》 mug.How come there's issues?
Did you run out of tissues?
From the day that I started,
Now I feel left hearted.
Did you run out of tissues?
From the day that I started,
Now I feel left hearted.
by Don't you know who I am November 23, 2023
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