texas asshole massacre

when your Texan uncle proceeds to take his 2 in. chode and steak knife, carve his initials with the knife on your right buttcheek and carve "DADDYS HOLE" on the left one.

hello, officer, my uncle texas asshole massacred my ass and i cant sit down without the blood from my buttcheek cuts start to seep out of my pants and all over the chair.

by Lou Sassoul December 17, 2019

fashizling my asshole

to tell a person that you were joking or to ask if someone is joking

person 1: "I just smashed your vase" person 2: "dude. are you fashizling my asshole?"

Example 2: person one: "did you just smash my vase" person 2: "no i was just fashizling your asshole"

by assdunker November 26, 2010

Stuck behind the asshole

Being stuck behind someone driving too slow. You stay behind them thinking that they are not gonna go exactly where you are going for long but they do. Then your frustration sets in being stuck behind the ASSHOLE!!!

I was driving home from work after a long week, I was making good time until I was stuck behind the asshole.

by cpetkunas February 16, 2019

Asshole Recovery Period

The lag time after a shit in which you're unable to sit down. Not to be confused with Post Shit Syndrome.

Rick had an hour long asshole recovery period after downing 2 foot long chilli cheese dogs.

by TesticularTorsion September 2, 2014

Asshole By Choice (ABC)

A person who consciously chooses to be mean or nasty when he or she can pick the moral high ground instead.

Asshole By Choice (ABC) : Who? That Guy? Oh he's an ABC. An Asshole By Choice! Why else would he kick that puppy?

by melaniexavier1 October 23, 2018

Self actualized asshole

Someone who already knows they're an asshole, even if you tell them another thousand times what an asshole or a jerk they are.

The guy was a self actualized asshole, or

If you like saying it a different way, he was the kind of asshole you say he was in a different bullshit way, simple.

by Solid Mantis August 7, 2019

go full-asshole

turning to extreme tyranny because one is damaged, vulnerable and misunderstood

"Cause in the Thor movie he's sort of damaged, vulnerable and misunderstood and it's only on this one I get to kinda cut loose and go full-asshole" -- Tom Hiddleston on Loki Laufeyson

by missjerry November 9, 2012