Monkey Fuck

To light your cigarette (smoke) from another persons cigarette - usually from a close friend or family member. This is only carried out when a lighter is not immediately available.
Sharon I need to Monkey Fuck your smoke as I can't find the lighter.
by lochon October 25, 2009
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monkey ass

The resultant condition from prolonged periods of poor personal hygiene (i.e. lack of showering) and physical activity leading to an uncomfortable, sweaty, red burning ass reminiscent of a large, red and bulbous monkey's ass which has been dragged through the sand and dirt all day and appears quite painful.
(See the latin, rectus sebaceous primatus)
Dude I gotta take a shower - I got some wicked monkey ass!
by zagnut February 21, 2005
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Monkey House

After anal fisting, the man or woman pulls out their hand and flings poo at their partner, mimicking the animals at the Monkey House at the Zoo.
After a rousing bout of ass-fisting, he pulled his hand out and Monkey Housed her.
by Cincy Chili Dog June 10, 2008
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hedge monkey

Wear home made clothes or ridiculous psychadelic tie die clothes, clothes of natural materials. They tend not to wash very often, hence they look like they have just slept in a hedge, or in fact live in hedges although we all know they really live in a squat with a peace symbol painted on the front door.

Somebody who tends to live the 'hippy' way of life to the extreme, they usually have white-boy dreads & take lots of 'earthy' drugs (weed/mushrooms/psychoactive plants etc & lsd), love travelling to festivals / acid techno squat parties in their 'freedom wagons' or VW camper vans, Beetle's or 20 year old decomissioned old service vans/trucks etc. Usually vegetarians and love going on protest marches/anti war/anti fox hunting marches etc.

Can be heavily into spirituality & regularly smell of josticks or special brew / cider. Sometimes mistaken for tramps.
"Last year at Glastonbury a hedge monkey was trying to sell me a 2nd class stamp saying that it was a giant tab of acid."
by Chewitt January 16, 2004
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portch-monkey

by n00b August 23, 2003
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Monkey Tits

An insult aimed at someone with less than average IQ, coolness factor, or Bodily Odor (in this case, more than average). Can also be used in place of a forgotten name.
Hey monkey tits, take a shower! You smell like a bag of smashed assholes.

Hey.... uh... Monkey Tits, get me a fucking beer before I hit you with a jizz rocket.
by the_guy January 14, 2005
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monkey dick

Breakfast sausage or sausage links. This term is used in military chow halls and prisons.
Let's cook eggs and monkey dicks for breakfast.
by Atomic Johnny March 30, 2005
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