arden theory

The Arden Theory is that no one named Arden actually looks like they’d be an Arden

Person 1: “oh look at this girl, Arden”
Person 2: “her name is Arden? She looks more like a Caitlyn to me…”
Person 1: “totally.”
Person 2: “see? Arden Theory.”

by Shrek5ever April 7, 2024

Conspiracy theory

What about Fat-Cock Self-Preservation Theory, Cody? What do you think of that one? The most profound and accurate conspiracy theory on the web!

Hym "How's this for a conspiracy theory: The accusations of liar and grifter do nothing to hurt right-wing pundits EXPLICITLY BECAUSE they aren't intended to hurt them but, rather, deflate the value of liar and grifter accusations in a deliberate attempt to cover for ineffective political opposition. Because sure you're calling them a liar and a grifter but if you can keep them in the forefront of people's minds you can keep out the MORE EFFECTIVE opposition out of the lime light and maintain the status quo. So, denigrating the political opposition ISN'T TO GET YOU TO STOP LISTENING TO JORDAN PETERSON... It to get you to focus on Jordan Peterson instead of me. Because he is harmless and ineffective and I am not."

by Hym Iam April 12, 2024

invisible string theory

Phenomenon popularized by tiktok, describes as having an "invisible string" between them and their partner. because of the string, they ran into each other multiple times in the past until they finally got together.

"The invisible string theory has been bringing us together for our entire lives"

by oohi;fioajsdpfojaifaoidjfodjsp April 14, 2024

Taxi Cab Theory

Men are like a taxi. In theory, If their light is on they will let someone in. If the light is off they will not.

If a man is ready for a relationship subconsciously he will get a girlfriend. If he is not, he will not.

Travis Scott left Kylie Jenner after years, but married Jojo Siwa. This is the taxi cab theory.

by yougboxb April 15, 2024

Critical fat-cock theory

This only thing you WON'T steal and promulgate.

Hym "Nobody else thinks that's weird? They'll steal EVERYTHING BUT critical fat-cock theory! That isn't weird to anyone else? God, I think it's weird. Don't you? Critical fat-cock theory! The ultimate theory! So profound it terrifies scholars and charlatans alike."

by Hym Iam April 22, 2024

Dead Internet Theory

Everything online right now is fake. Algorithmic curation, bot activity, filters and AI generated content. Are you communicating with a real person or code?

The Internet died years ago but nobody noticed, Dead Internet Theory is real...

by Nukem6 May 4, 2024

Dead Mall Theory

Dead Mall Theory posits a multifaceted critique of modern consumerism and the evolving landscape of digital and physical spaces. Drawing inspiration from the eerie aesthetic of the Backrooms and the nostalgic satire of vaporwave Micro-culture, it explores the decline of traditional malls as emblematic of broader societal shifts.
At its core, Dead Mall Theory echoes the sentiment of the Dead Internet Theory, suggesting that just as malls become "dead" when anchor stores vanish, online spaces are increasingly dominated by bots and AI-generated content, displacing genuine human interaction and agency. This convergence reflects the erosion of authentic connection and the commodification of both physical and virtual environments under the pressures of mass production and consumer capitalism.

I love walking along these halls, such a calming atmosphere but this place isn't making money so dead mall theory is in full effect. I have memories of playing in this spot at the arcade as a kid. Now the movie theatre is gone and the food court is half empty.

by Nukem6 May 4, 2024