touching grass

something i should do but i am a lazy fucking retard lol

Person 1: Why don't you go touch some fucking grass?
Person 2: fuck u. i'm not touching grass

by Someone called Frederick January 04, 2022

touch yourself

To masterbate

I wonder how you touch yourself, curse myself for being across the sea

by Sho0ting$tar December 22, 2023

Touch my plum

Caressing the lower back/upper butt where the crack begins.

His hand slid down my back and I felt him touch my plum.

by HisAlienGirl November 20, 2015

Labrador touch

Much like the Midas touch turns everything to gold, a Labrador touch turns everything to shit.

Man everything I've tried working on this week has broken or gotten worse, I really have the Labrador touch.

by Labradortouch1000 January 26, 2024

touch muffin

When you finger your lady friend and use the excess spit, cum, vagina juices to make a creamy muffin.

Tina: Bill gave me a touch muffin last night!
Atira: No way I wish I could get a man like that to give me a touch muffin!
Tina: Stfu Atira you ugly slut.

by dickscrambler February 03, 2016

Touched a wee bit of blurt

The action of feeling, touching or caressing somebody’s ass.

Derek: What’s happening big man, any action on the weekend?
Ben: Yeah, touched a wee bit of blurt.

by Dickbon May 16, 2025

0 Touches

When a player plays a game of Australian Rules Football and does not register a single stat.

'Did you hear about Jack on the weekend? He had 0 touches.'

by Chickenschnitzel August 06, 2018