Bartholomew Johnson

Bartholomew Johnson is a one of a kind talking pup. He speaks, he barks, he humps. Barthy for short, he doesn’t know when to shut his mouth. But to know the pup is to love the pup

Bartholomew Johnson was very excited when he found out he was spending the weekend with his wifey and not his ex hubby.

by Xojojonoss May 26, 2022

The Johnson Effect

The ability to make the absolute worst decision every single time. Named after the UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson.

The Johnson Effect: when you could have had a smaller lockdown for a short period of time but instead you chose to do nothing and now the whole country is screwed.

by FlangeManger October 30, 2020

bad Johnson

Can be used In place of any object or device. Can be big or small. Can really be anything.

“Hey can you pass me the remote?”
“Yeah which one?”
“That bad Johnson over there on the table!”

by Sparky 550 December 31, 2023

Johnson bar

Slang for a large penis.

Look at the Johnson bar on that dude!

by anonymous March 15, 2024

Johnson

A man with no confidence that molest children and young adults

Oh my Johnson you in the kids again

by Nig man March 28, 2021

Patrick Johnson

In a bipartisan relationship, the act of enforcing a belief system between both individuals which seeks only to fit the needs of production, usually - to fill the needs of the controlling party's sexual desires (see fetishized capitalism, systematic sexual dysmorphia)

The whole time, I was unaware that his desire to Patrick Johnson me, far outweighed the needs of mine.

by big_hungoids January 25, 2022

Chocolate Johnson

When you stick your finger in someone’s ass and then put it in their mouth without warning.

“I got with this chick last weekend and I gave her the old Chocolate Johnson.”

by Mrs. Stinky Flaps October 31, 2020