up shit creek with no paddle

To be in a bind with no solution

A trunk full of dank and the blue lights come , on behind you, your up shit creek with no paddle

by tinab November 22, 2013

whatever paddles your canoe

Synonymous with "whatever floats your boat".

So you're into that? Well, whatever paddles your canoe, man.

by Deliciously. May 9, 2010

paddle ball pussy cat

When you insert your penis into a cat, tie it to you with rubber bands or bungees, then dangle a cat toy just above its head. This will make the cat jump to get the toy, but the rubber bands will make the cat come right back down causing you to ejaculate after a few lunges.
NOTE: Excessive use on male cats can result in the cat having a pink sock.

Sally was looking all around the house for her cat Penny when she looked in her bedroom to find her husband playing paddle ball pussy cat on her bed.

by T. Jacifer Priest Emmett November 16, 2007

paddle your own canoe

A euphemism for female masturbation, see also scratching the pink turn table of love, jamming out with your clam out, flicking the bean etc,

A female wank

John was out of town so i decided id paddle my own canoe or mid coituis Im over this why don't you paddle your own canoe

by Jizzl September 18, 2014

Up shit creek without a paddle

In Australia it means that you're in a lot of trouble, with no foreseeable way out.

"Oh man, I can't believe I lost my paperwork; that stuff took me hours and it needs to be in by tomorrow!"
"Sounds like you're up shit creek without a paddle, mate."

by Lyrebleu November 2, 2013

Paddle faster, I hear banjos!

A common exclamation when in or around hillbilly infested areas. Doesn't necessarily need to be used when in a canoe; merely a warning to the other non-hillbillies in the vicinity.

It was a bright and sunny day when my father and I decided to go fishing down by the ol' waterhole. I remember that the seagulls looked like delicate little clouds, fluttering in the breeze. We made our way to our canoe and rowed out, fishing rods in hand and a song in our hearts. As we made our way down to the waterhole, we became aware of an eerie silence. The trees around us swayed to a halt. Then, quietly at first but raising in intensity, we heard the twang of a banjo. My father turned to me, his face colorless as he said "Paddle faster, I hear banjos!"

by Survival Guide May 12, 2010

Up shit creek without a paddle

(Idiom) To be in an undesirable situation*.

*Elitist would actually enjoy this.

by Kung-Fu Jesus May 10, 2004