ass shelf

A massive ass that seems detached from the rest of the body and could easily be used as a table.
Her ass shelf was so big you could use it to host a wedding reception.
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ass shelf

any surface at around ass level that serves as a make shift seat. Common types of ass shelves are window sills, arms of chairs, any sort of ledge, and if your creative your friends. As the word "shelf" suggests in the term, ass shelves serve as the perfect place to store your ass when a regular chair just won't do the trick.
Queefy: " Oh hey, who would have known that your arm would make such a great seat! I could sit here for days."
Hoeleen:"Don't look at me...I'm not ok with being your ass shelf!"
Queefy: "Lies...your loving every second of being my ass shelf ;) ! "
by PresOfDaFriends May 20, 2011
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Shelf Girl

A Shelf Girl is a word used to describe a girl who is used by guys only when they're desperate for some lovin', and haven't gotten laid in quite a while, so they call up a Shelf Girl, and invite her over. After getting some, they casually put this girl back, and completely ignore her until they're ready for another booty call.
Girl: "We totally went to 3rd base last night, we're in love!"
Boy: "Nah, you got it all wrong. He doesn't like you much. I mean sure, you're hot and all, but you're also a real annoyning bitch. You're just another one of his Shelf Girls. Sorry to break it to ya'!"
Girl: "..."
by BottomB January 18, 2010
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Dick Shelf

A place for a man to rest his penis after sex.
Friend 1: Aw man I just had the best threesome of my life, mind if I use this as a dick shelf?
Friend 2: Dude, that's my keyboard!

or

Friend 2: Dude, that's my girlfriend's head!
Friend 1: Yea, she makes a good dick shelf.
by FishHookers February 20, 2008
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shelf life

(similar to one existing def.-but expanded!)

length of time of physical and/or sexual desirability in a human. a reference to body parts 'gone/going bad' due to lack of maintenance, genetics, and/or 'human chronological erosion'

-'goods' 'for sale', only at their 'prime' for a "limited" time!!

a sunny, optimistic, "good personality" (other skills?) MAY sometimes offset this!
that babes' shelf life is increasingly SHORT!

his beer gut is superseded by his million dollar payday, extending his shelf life.

the old fool imagined his shelf life hadn't expired 20 years previous...

the shelf life of that perky butt is questionable!!
by michael foolsley July 01, 2012
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Top Shelf

When two men engage in double penetration (DP) of a female the man in the top hole is going "top shelf".
Dude, I'm down to DP this chick with you but I'm calling top shelf all the way. I don't want your bag slapping all over me.
by nemensclubmpls February 11, 2012
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Shelf-righteous

(adj.) Having or being characterized by an unprecedented lack of morality in the presence of others, often to please others. Someone who is shelf-righteous is congenitally virtuous, but often leaves their morals ‘on the shelf’ in the presence of their friends or coworkers. A shelf-righteous act is typically done to appease a peer whose view is highly bigoted or jaundiced.
Person 1:I can’t fathom why he would ever say such a thing. He’s not that kind of person.
Person 2: He probably said it in the heat of the moment, in the presence of his friends.
Person 1: Wow he’s so shelf-righteous.
by endearingfellow May 07, 2020
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