Also known as homo inferior mushtus. The latest evolution of the common Rat.
Generally a pack animal, chavs are only to be found alone when serving "blackup" duty for a fight or theft. Otherwise there will be at least five of them, ranging in ages from 8-24.At least half of them will be related in some way, leading one to presume that the chav culture encourages inbreeding. This pack is not to be underestimated, as if angered it is quite capable of taking down a stunned 3 year old, if it has the element of surprise.
Standard attire has already been mentioned multiple times in these definitions, so I do not believe I need to elaborate there.
Years of self-enforced isolation from the rest of the cultured world has lead to the chav race developing it's own primitive culture. In this ideology, tacky "celebrity" icons are awarded the same devotion as demi-gods, when there only claim to fame is either through making an appalling R&B track, posing naked for newspapers, or appearing on a dubious reality TV show such as big brother.
The pack leader of a group of chavs can easily be recognised: usually the oldest, he (chavs are patriachal) will always be smoking a 2-week old fag, will be so laden with fake gold "bling" that he will barely be able to walk, and will be wearing the most realistic looking fake sports gear. The Head Chavs word is law in such a pack, though sometimes there are contests for leadership.
Such contests are highly ritualised. They will inevitably start with a slur on the head chavs parentage. The head chav will then reply "you wot mush?" or something similar, and will walk threateningly towards the other chav, indicating that the challenge is accepted. The two chavs will stand together, looking straight into each others face, trying to use sheer body mass to push the other one down. Eventually, one chav will have to use his arms to force the other one back, to avoid being overpowered. Insults will continue up untill this stage. Once the pushing back stage has occured, overall victory will be granted to the chav who can "nut" the other one quickest. Such contests of strength are very common.
The chav language is a crue facsimile of the English dialect of the region they inhabit. The words have been twisted beyond all recognition, and often used to mean the complete opposite of what they used to mean. For example, chavvettes are often refered to as "fit" by male chavs, when they appear to have all the sex appeal of a dead haddock. Expletives, "innit", "like", and "yeah" are used instead of commas, full stops and other punctuation marks in the chav speech.
The government debates over this problem nearly every day, but so far no action has been taken. They can't decide whether to use Napalm, Nukes, flamethrowers, or just give each human citizen a shotgun and tell them "happy hunting".
Generally a pack animal, chavs are only to be found alone when serving "blackup" duty for a fight or theft. Otherwise there will be at least five of them, ranging in ages from 8-24.At least half of them will be related in some way, leading one to presume that the chav culture encourages inbreeding. This pack is not to be underestimated, as if angered it is quite capable of taking down a stunned 3 year old, if it has the element of surprise.
Standard attire has already been mentioned multiple times in these definitions, so I do not believe I need to elaborate there.
Years of self-enforced isolation from the rest of the cultured world has lead to the chav race developing it's own primitive culture. In this ideology, tacky "celebrity" icons are awarded the same devotion as demi-gods, when there only claim to fame is either through making an appalling R&B track, posing naked for newspapers, or appearing on a dubious reality TV show such as big brother.
The pack leader of a group of chavs can easily be recognised: usually the oldest, he (chavs are patriachal) will always be smoking a 2-week old fag, will be so laden with fake gold "bling" that he will barely be able to walk, and will be wearing the most realistic looking fake sports gear. The Head Chavs word is law in such a pack, though sometimes there are contests for leadership.
Such contests are highly ritualised. They will inevitably start with a slur on the head chavs parentage. The head chav will then reply "you wot mush?" or something similar, and will walk threateningly towards the other chav, indicating that the challenge is accepted. The two chavs will stand together, looking straight into each others face, trying to use sheer body mass to push the other one down. Eventually, one chav will have to use his arms to force the other one back, to avoid being overpowered. Insults will continue up untill this stage. Once the pushing back stage has occured, overall victory will be granted to the chav who can "nut" the other one quickest. Such contests of strength are very common.
The chav language is a crue facsimile of the English dialect of the region they inhabit. The words have been twisted beyond all recognition, and often used to mean the complete opposite of what they used to mean. For example, chavvettes are often refered to as "fit" by male chavs, when they appear to have all the sex appeal of a dead haddock. Expletives, "innit", "like", and "yeah" are used instead of commas, full stops and other punctuation marks in the chav speech.
The government debates over this problem nearly every day, but so far no action has been taken. They can't decide whether to use Napalm, Nukes, flamethrowers, or just give each human citizen a shotgun and tell them "happy hunting".
Chav translator guide:
"You wot mush? Fuckin' bang you out!"
Means: "I believe that you have inadvertly insulted me. I am likely to take offence over this slur."
"And wot, you batty, wot you gonna fuckin' do abowt it?"
Means: I cannot think of something to say at this moment in time. Please wait untill my brain cell has aligned itself correctly and we may be able to talk.
"Oi, mate, you gorra lite?"
Means: I have accidently forgotten my cheap, inefficient lighter or packet of cut-price matches. Please can you help me, despite the fact I am 4 years to young to smoke.
"You wot mush? Fuckin' bang you out!"
Means: "I believe that you have inadvertly insulted me. I am likely to take offence over this slur."
"And wot, you batty, wot you gonna fuckin' do abowt it?"
Means: I cannot think of something to say at this moment in time. Please wait untill my brain cell has aligned itself correctly and we may be able to talk.
"Oi, mate, you gorra lite?"
Means: I have accidently forgotten my cheap, inefficient lighter or packet of cut-price matches. Please can you help me, despite the fact I am 4 years to young to smoke.
by Azrael88 March 12, 2006
1) Person who does not believe in banks (as such, retains funds as gold plated jewellery)
2) Someone who believes they can go out about their everyday business wearing head-to-toe white without getting it dirty.
3) Someone who believes they are capable of assaulting others. (one who is mislead).
4) Someone who pretends to take drugs, but in fact cannot afford such a habit.
5) Someone who feels strongly against the artistic talents of the real world, and so create their own, self contained culture.
2) Someone who believes they can go out about their everyday business wearing head-to-toe white without getting it dirty.
3) Someone who believes they are capable of assaulting others. (one who is mislead).
4) Someone who pretends to take drugs, but in fact cannot afford such a habit.
5) Someone who feels strongly against the artistic talents of the real world, and so create their own, self contained culture.
by d01 April 23, 2003
Twats,
They enjoy partaking in antisocial behavior,
They enjoy white lightening
They tuck their tracksuits into their socks to save money if they become ankle swingers,
They are more hated than any other social group in the UK
They enjoy partaking in antisocial behavior,
They enjoy white lightening
They tuck their tracksuits into their socks to save money if they become ankle swingers,
They are more hated than any other social group in the UK
Lets stand on a street corner and drink white lightening while shouting abuse at some old lady through a stolen traffic cone
by Snitchio June 11, 2005
The word Chav is, in fact, an acronym for Council House Associated Vermin, this is reflected in their magpie like attraction to shiny things as well as discount fake sports wear. Chavs can also be identified by the vomit inducing stench of stale tobacco smoke and unwashed clothes
by Heavy Metal Man December 29, 2008
(n.) Stupid, ignorant, often illiterate moron with no respect for other human beings. Generally have very bad taste in music and clothing, they are afraid of anything vaguely complicated or different. Commonly speak like dis m8, innit. txt tlk isnt kl m8, so dnt use it, k?! (These stupid creatures are easily outwitted)
1. 'Go faster' stripes.
2. Burbery.
3. White trainers(especially nike or reebok).
4. tlkin like a moron m8 innit
5. Thick 'gold' chain worn round neck.
6. Soveriegn rings.
7. Big hoopy earings.
8. Listens to rap, hip-hop,r&b and/or dance style music.
9.Hate goths.
10.Difficult to understand.
You're getting bored! All of these are signs of chavvyness!
2. Burbery.
3. White trainers(especially nike or reebok).
4. tlkin like a moron m8 innit
5. Thick 'gold' chain worn round neck.
6. Soveriegn rings.
7. Big hoopy earings.
8. Listens to rap, hip-hop,r&b and/or dance style music.
9.Hate goths.
10.Difficult to understand.
You're getting bored! All of these are signs of chavvyness!
by Iamme123 December 19, 2005
A lame excuse for a teenager.
Usually sporting every single bit of Nike they can find and the whitest trainers you have ever seen.
The usual habitat for a chav is either McDonalds or outside the Co-op.
And looking 'hard' on their BMX's.
Seem too refer too everyone as 'mate' even though they are having a go at them.
Mostly they think they are sex on legs, but everyone knows we just laugh about them behind their backs.
Usually sporting every single bit of Nike they can find and the whitest trainers you have ever seen.
The usual habitat for a chav is either McDonalds or outside the Co-op.
And looking 'hard' on their BMX's.
Seem too refer too everyone as 'mate' even though they are having a go at them.
Mostly they think they are sex on legs, but everyone knows we just laugh about them behind their backs.
Chav: OI YOU MATE.
Normal: ... Hi?
Chav: ARE YOU STARTING ON ME?
Normal: .. No -Thinking- Why is this randomer having a go?
Chav: -Lights 'Fag'- I AIN'T EVEN BOTHERED MATE.
Normal: Ok then.. O.O
Normal: ... Hi?
Chav: ARE YOU STARTING ON ME?
Normal: .. No -Thinking- Why is this randomer having a go?
Chav: -Lights 'Fag'- I AIN'T EVEN BOTHERED MATE.
Normal: Ok then.. O.O
by Katehhh March 06, 2008
A Chav is a type of person, usually aged 10-29, known for their anti-social behavior and a rough lifestyle that incudes hanging around the street and starting conflicts with people who are not like them. The Chavs are todays menaces on Britain’s streets, roaming urban areas causing trouble and vandalizing things at random. Other names for chavs include: Chavette (a female chav), neds (used in Scotland), townies and ratboys.
Chavs wear hooded sweaters, tracksuit bottoms tucked into their socks and baseball caps – usually Burberry - at a 45 degree angle - sometimes with a hood over. Cheap jewelery is commonplace on most chavs or chavettes, ranging from fancy chains on the boys and massive ear rings on the female chavs.
Their musical taste mainly includes R&B, Hip-hop, dance and other similar genres. Chav targets include moshers, emos and other people who don't dress or act the way the typical chav does.
At most MacDonald’s outlets at least 7 or 8 chavs are knocking about, buzzing about the playground swing they tore off the other day, or humiliating the people who walk through the door or sit on the next table along. Chavs (or chavettes) also like to hang out a kids playgrounds, bus stops, and many other places where they stand the chance of abusing innocent people till the police come and sort them out. Even at the cinema there are chavs (not even watching the film) sitting there showing off their mobiles and throwing popcorn at a person 5 rows down.
Chavs are known to vandilise bus stops, throw stones at windows and mugging old ladies trying to get home after a long walk around town. Other chav activities include grafitti-ing public toilets and road signs, getting themselves drunk on a friday night in the streets and some go as far as stealing cars and driving down street at 100 mph.
They are at large in almost every town and city in the UK. If you ever come across a chav, approach with caution and prepare for a load of "what na fuck ya looking at ya silly twat!" and "av ya got any spare change for ma bus fare?"
Chavs wear hooded sweaters, tracksuit bottoms tucked into their socks and baseball caps – usually Burberry - at a 45 degree angle - sometimes with a hood over. Cheap jewelery is commonplace on most chavs or chavettes, ranging from fancy chains on the boys and massive ear rings on the female chavs.
Their musical taste mainly includes R&B, Hip-hop, dance and other similar genres. Chav targets include moshers, emos and other people who don't dress or act the way the typical chav does.
At most MacDonald’s outlets at least 7 or 8 chavs are knocking about, buzzing about the playground swing they tore off the other day, or humiliating the people who walk through the door or sit on the next table along. Chavs (or chavettes) also like to hang out a kids playgrounds, bus stops, and many other places where they stand the chance of abusing innocent people till the police come and sort them out. Even at the cinema there are chavs (not even watching the film) sitting there showing off their mobiles and throwing popcorn at a person 5 rows down.
Chavs are known to vandilise bus stops, throw stones at windows and mugging old ladies trying to get home after a long walk around town. Other chav activities include grafitti-ing public toilets and road signs, getting themselves drunk on a friday night in the streets and some go as far as stealing cars and driving down street at 100 mph.
They are at large in almost every town and city in the UK. If you ever come across a chav, approach with caution and prepare for a load of "what na fuck ya looking at ya silly twat!" and "av ya got any spare change for ma bus fare?"
chav: "what sort a fuckin clothes are they?"
mosher: "shut up you chavscum, and obey your ASBO"
chav: "ee ya cheaky twat, i'll smack ya, ya fuckin dickhead"
mosher: *walks up to chav*
chav: *runs up to his 15 year old pregnant girlfriend (chavette)* "give us a hand, that wanker is startin on me innit!"
chavette: "get ere ya dickhead, nobody disses ma baby boy!"
mosher: *runs away quickly*
chavette: *starts to run after him but shes so pissed she hasnt got the pace to keep up with him*
mosher: "shut up you chavscum, and obey your ASBO"
chav: "ee ya cheaky twat, i'll smack ya, ya fuckin dickhead"
mosher: *walks up to chav*
chav: *runs up to his 15 year old pregnant girlfriend (chavette)* "give us a hand, that wanker is startin on me innit!"
chavette: "get ere ya dickhead, nobody disses ma baby boy!"
mosher: *runs away quickly*
chavette: *starts to run after him but shes so pissed she hasnt got the pace to keep up with him*
by Toughers August 04, 2006