Some steamy 13 year old squeker that likes to sell avon to you. He sometimes tries to get you in his white van saying that there is even more avon there, to then take you to his shed or basement. In there he will earrape you and feed you freshly hunted avon from the wilds, destroying many generations of avon families. Once he is done earraping the flap out of you he lets you watch some flapkuts also known as the humpback whale named steven. Steven is very ugly btw
1. Avon. 2. White van. 3. Blackout. 4. Complete earrape and more avon. 5. Some random things.
Ewan: i has avon for you in my white van.
You: no thx.
Ewan: GET IN THE VAN
Ewan: i has avon for you in my white van.
You: no thx.
Ewan: GET IN THE VAN
by Advanced Derp May 9, 2017
Get the Ewanmug. by Ethan hayyyy November 24, 2021
Get the Ewanmug. by Cowan123 January 20, 2023
Get the Ewan Diseasemug. A big L of a human, likes to avoid all constancy with any human and is shit scared of girls, but then says gay stuff so he must be gay
by HKDABADMAN 420 October 27, 2021
Get the Ewanmug. ABSOLUTE egotistical and vainglorious piece of cod. In his clueless nature, he will never understand how to show affection and is completely indolent when it comes to trying in every aspect. This slow moving and good for nothing moron will neglect, mistreat and disrespect you on every level. He will gaslight and blame his inconstant and disloyal behaviour on everything but himself, so don't even think about confronting him about anything. Ewan will be thoroughly and unconditionally tiresome with his ambiguous language, constantly failing to see both sides of the story.
Oh, and he is most definitely afraid of spiders.
Word of advice: Never date this cheating capricorn.... you will regret it.
Oh, and he is most definitely afraid of spiders.
Word of advice: Never date this cheating capricorn.... you will regret it.
Me:"Gosh i feel as if i'm trying to draw blood out of a stone"
Friend: "Oh are you talking to Ewan?"
Me: "How did you guess?!!"
Friend: "Oh are you talking to Ewan?"
Me: "How did you guess?!!"
by ilovetoseeyousmile May 21, 2021
Get the Ewanmug. A Ewan on its own is a true devil but if you come across a Ewan FIELDING you are in trouble they are tall monsters that smell like poo and rotten oranges they are ugly fat and have a torso in the shape of a peanut but luckily for you if you encounter a Ewan fielding they are EXTREMELY stupid and slow runners
by Is the truth to hard bi**h November 10, 2019
Get the Ewan fieldingmug. by fuckitlollll November 23, 2021
Get the Ewanmug.