i have witnesses

a cop out you use sometimes when someone else says they didnt do something you told them they did. sometimes it can happen because of drinking a lot over the years and it would make you think that. or if ur just drunk af. it can also happen because you just wanna fake rat on someone for fun.

guy 1: hey you broke my push broom!

guy 2: no i didnt because i dont remember it breaking when using it.

guy 1: i have witnesses!

guy 2: your crazy

guy 1: no im not!

guy 2: *talks under his breath* boy i bet he drinks alot!

by nobody else here October 23, 2017

Therefore I Am

THE best song from Billie Eilish's second album, Happier Than Ever.

I'm not your friend
Or anything, damn.
You think that you're the man.
I think, therefore I am.

Fun fact: the last line is originally a saying from 16th century French mathematician and philosopher Rene Descartes.

by AnonymousProgressiveRebel March 28, 2024

I AIN'T FUCKING READIN' ALL THAT

I ain't fucking reading of all that

guy; makes a whole ass paragraph

me; I AIN'T FUCKING READIN' ALL THAT

by bhubhuh May 20, 2023

Eliza is the best class president ever in the whole world I praise the ground she walks on

She's amazing. Also used to send the 25 questions which I have no idea about.

Person 1: Eliza is the best class president ever in the whole world I praise the ground she walks on
Eliza: Wow so true here are the 25 questions

by ionlyseemygoals_ September 25, 2023

I’m going to prove that my Mamamoo mummy is proud of me I love them

I’m going to prove that my Mamamoo mummy is proud of me I love them

I’m going to prove that my Mamamoo mummy is proud of me I love them

by syafinaz? October 22, 2023

I smell bacon

Means there is a cop near by

You are about to light a joint. Your friend sees a cop crossing the road toward you, and says "I smell bacon"

by BRETTBTCH July 30, 2022

MOM I GOTTA GO PEE

This is a very common phrase used by children under the age of 8 who forgot to go pee before the 10 hour long roadtrip.

This phrase is used because before the roadtrip started, the mom asks, do you have to go pee timmy? timmy usually says no.

30 minutes into the roadtrip... MOM I GOTTA GO PEE.

thus angering the mom.

Timmy: MOM I GOTTA GO PEE!!!!!!

Mom: Shut up Timmy.

by HIHIHI LOLOLOLOLOLOL12343 November 09, 2023