bum shower

A hand-held device used to clean ones anus with a jet of water after using the toilet.
Originating in India, this device is rapidly replacing the use of a mug for the same purpose.

Dave: Damn it, that burrito I ate gave me runny shits. I'll be leaving brows streaks in my underpants for a week now.
Kumar: Why not use a bum shower? It removes all fecal matter and leaves a minty-fresh aroma.
Dave: Great! I'll try it.
<Dave uses a bum shower>
Dave: Excellent! My ass is minty-fresh and my laundry bills will go down!

by Lord Ownage February 21, 2015

bum towel

A bum towel is a personal towel used specifically to dry ones butt cheeks (buttocks) and butt crack (inter gluteal cleft) after a bath, shower or swim.

The aim is to prevent wiping your arse over the rest of your body.

Did you just use my bum towel to wash your face? You just got my fecal matter all up in your grill.

by sharpchef March 23, 2015

Urgent Bum

When you're in polite company but you've eaten a dodgy kebab the night before and your arse is about to explode with diarrhoea.

"Do excuse me Elizabeth, but the kebab I ate last night has given me a touch of the urgent bum."

by Pooisa October 16, 2017

bum bread

the act of shitting between 2 pieces of bread to create a sandwhich.

crocker: hey guys im back with a sandwich
me: you have most probably shat in that
ash: yeah he did he's eating bum bread.

by fleat101 July 11, 2011

bum scratch

term used to identify someone who dresses like shit to social outtings

homeboy looks like a straight up bum scratch walkin in da club with his basketball pull-away shorts on

by kanhai knights December 27, 2008

bum trumpet

To fart; release gas; flatulence.

Hi, little bobby, did you just bum trumpet?

by keens February 11, 2004

Bum Crumble

To administer a royal bumming...To open a can of whoopass on one's friend/nemesis/child...To give someone a jolly good thrashing at something, e.g. a computer game, or contact sport such as killing.

"You'd better not be trying to overtake me adey. I am the king of rollcage and I shall be making bum crumble if you aren't careful. you assmunch."

"Put that child down adey, you can't bring him with you or you'll get a fresh serving of bum crumble from that police officer"

by Mighty O May 14, 2008