Well color me surprised

A phrase used when you are surprised and impressed with an outcome, especially when you were sure nothing good was going to come of it. Similar to saying "Well I'll be damned" or "Well I'll be a monkey's uncle".
After watching a movie that you were so sure would be terrible but it ended up being pretty good, you may say: "Well color me surprised."
by Subject7 June 29, 2011
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Chinese Log Smash Surprise

When one finally drops a quality hot and steamy log that hangs from ass to toilet water after extreme constipation and does not realize that it has not detached from the anal cavity, causing him/her to proceed with the wiping process, and violently "smash" through the log. It is called a "surprise" because the victim usually responds with "HOLY SHIT!" or "MY BUNG HOLE!" or "DOUBLE YOU TEE EFF!"
1. "I was walking past the bathroom while my brother was taking a shit and I heard the beginning poot but did not here the ending splash that usually follows. I realized what was happening and immediately yelled 'DICK, WAIT!....but it was too late..he had experienced his first Chinese Log Smash Surprise."

2. "After 3 weeks of being constipated I had taken my glory dump, not knowing that the magnificent log had not detached. As I went to wipe (from front to back) I had my 5th Chinese Log Smash Surprise this month!"

3. "After his Chinese Log Smash Surprise, Jim's hand never recovered..."
by Dr. Wack Meehoff May 27, 2011
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I typed this hoping for a good definition and was surprised that this was not a word.
bob: I am surprised that this is not a word

billy: which word

bob: what I just said
billy: oh
by i give up on finding a name January 14, 2021
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Black Jack Taco Surprise

When a black guy pretends to creampie a girl. And then busts in her face.
Guy: Im done.

Girl: That was quick.
Guy: Sike. BLACK JACK TACO SURPRISE BITCH!!!!!!!!
by A Sizzle and Banana Hands October 19, 2009
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Anal Cream Pie Surprise

When you are fucking a girl doggy style right before you pull out and cum in her face, you stick your dick in her ass and then you cum inside her anal canal.
"Me" Dude I gave Sam an Anal Cream Pie Surprise last night, it was amazing!
"Friend" Dude that's gross!
by Su1c1dal Duck December 11, 2013
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Surprise pussy jack-attack

When you're pleasuring yourself under the covers, and your feline friend playfully attacks your moving hand, thereby totally ruining the mood.
Last night I was { jacking off},and just as I was getting ready to {cum}, Fluffy pulled a Surprise pussy jack-attack and totally broke my rhythm.
by Balls O'Rork July 07, 2010
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After baking a normal blumpkin pie (shitting into a pie dish whilst having your cock sucked), you let your girl tuck into it. While she's chowing down, you go to the fridge and get a coconut, then you smack the bitch so hard in the back of the head with it that her face splats into your shit and she goes unconcious.
Guy 1: Hey what'd you get up to last night?

Guy 2: My wife was tucking into some of my blumpkin pie and then I smacked the fuck out of her with a coconut. Her face hit the pie so hard shit sprayed the walls.

Guy 3: Sweet I'd love to get a Blumpkin pie with a coconut surprise .
by DAT MAD HATTER November 01, 2009
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