the toothpaste defense

An excuse people on probation use when they report to probation and have to do a breathalyzer and they fail. They say they just brushed their teeth, which leaves small reading of alcohol in their mouth.

Probation officer: You failed your breathalyzer, you are going to jail.

Probationer: No I didn't drink, I just brushed my teeth before I came here.

Probation officer: don't try the toothpaste defense on me! You're going to jail!

the toothpaste defense by Lupara2012 July 31, 2012

English Toothpaste 

English Toothpaste: Definition: When a partner during anal sex gets "shit dick" then takes the object out of the anus of the receiving partner and then rubs, like a toothbrush, the feces on the partner's teeth. Derivation: comes from the belief about the English having poor dentistry thus disgusting teeth.

Two guys are talking about how "nasty" their girlfriends are:
Tim: "My girlfriend is so nasty that she gave me head at the movies last night."
TJ: "Fuck that, thats not nasty. Nasty is my girlfriend, she let me give her English Toothpaste."

English Toothpaste by Joe Lattari February 16, 2008

squeezing the tube of toothpaste 

1:a euphonism for what happens at staff parties at the queens place in england

"dude, squeeze my tube of toothpaste."

squeezing the tube of toothpaste by Tim November 20, 2003

Texas Toothpaste 

When a man ejaculates into his hand and rubs it into his partner’s mouth manually.

Brian: “Dude, I totally gave that chick from the bar some Texas Toothpaste last night.”

Jeff: “Damn, that’s kinda gross.”

Texas Toothpaste by xReaperx666 October 16, 2021

Tia Juana Toothpaste 

A cumshot into the mouth of a female recipient from any man of Mexican decent.

Yeah Ese, I took out this White-tina' chick and first night eh' she went down on me eh' and i gave her some Tia Juana Toothpaste and sent her straight to bed eh'. Ju know what i mean ese?

Tia Juana Toothpaste by a wetexplosion January 23, 2011

bitch toothpaste 

the mythical frothy mixture between semen and urine.

if a man could blow his wad and piss at the same time, the resulting liquid would be called bitch toothpaste.

bitch toothpaste by danny69 January 21, 2006

mother of toothpaste

int. used in place of "oh my god" or "god damnit"; used by religeous people.

also "sweet mary, mother of toothpaste!"

mother of toothpaste, that hurt!

mother of toothpaste by Aninymouse October 24, 2003