An attempt by a hedge fund to make the fuck on an ape, when in fact the ape is the one who does the fucks.
Did you remember that time that Marvin Crapital tried to do the rapes on those smooth brains, but woke up with a sore butthole? He really hedge fucked himself on that one.
by SmoovBrain April 15, 2021
When a fan places a wager against their favorite team in a game or other event. This causes a win/win situation for the fan. Either the fan’s favorite team wins or the fan win their bet.
James: I bet on the Nuggets to lose.
Jake: but aren’t you a fan of the Nuggets?
James: yes, but if they lose, I want to at least get paid.
Jake: ahh, the old happiness hedge
Kyle: true dat
Jake: but aren’t you a fan of the Nuggets?
James: yes, but if they lose, I want to at least get paid.
Jake: ahh, the old happiness hedge
Kyle: true dat
by cupofjuice93 May 23, 2023
when you date or attempt to date a high calorie individual (typically a girl) because you see the potential if they lost weight
by iridocyclitis_penjamin July 24, 2024
when you date or attempt to date a high calorie individual (typically a girl) because you see the potential if they lost weight
by iridocyclitis_penjamin July 24, 2024
by MeltdMushroom October 06, 2019