Ketchup Blindness

A rare phenomenon wherein the affected person can not find the item they are looking for in the refrigerator, despite looking directly at it several times. Affects more than one in seven married men.

Husband: Why are we always out of ketchup?
Wife: What are you talking about it's literally right in front of your face!
Husband: Oh, no... I have ketchup blindness.
Wife: Noooooooo!

by jeorb87 December 10, 2020

ketchup boogers

The dried ring of ketchup that forms around the lid, causing undue anxiety should it happen to fall into your food. Can also be applied to other condiments/food items.

Nobody ever wipes off the excess ketchup from the nozzle, now there are ketchup boogers everywhere!

by Betsey Bodaschweri May 14, 2011

stale ketchup

3 day old period blood found in a McDonalds bathroom.

I used some stale ketchup on my Big Mac.

by HappyMeal145879 October 11, 2013

ketchup dispenser

Abbreviation for Vagina, but is used more as a gross term than good.

Her ketchup dispenser is on its rags again.

Its that time of the month for the ketchup dispenser.

by Joe Blogggs October 30, 2006

Ketchup Memory

A memory about something you think is insignificant in the moment like having the perfect ratio of ketchup to fries, but it turns out to be something unforgettable in your life; The little memories that matter.

"I've forgotten so many things that I thought were important during my college career, but I will always remember that one time I had a perfect ketchup to fries ratio. So that's my ketchup memory"

"It hasn't hit me yet that I'm graduating, but eventually all of the Ketchup is going to spill and I'm going to cry"

by TheHottestMonthIsApril April 29, 2015

ketchup stick

another word for a used/bloody tampon.

While snooping through my girlfriends bathroom. I opened the cabinet under the sink and saw at least 300 ketchup sticks just laying on the floor.

by baaba December 15, 2009

ketchup jerk

A hand job done with the thumb on the bottom of the shaft.

1. A discreet hand job.
2. Giving a hand job while looking away or covering one's face shamefully.
3. A hand job done out of obligation.
4. A rushed hand job.

A. Hey dude, your girl gave me a ketchup jerk under the table.

by WillBriz August 28, 2006