Beard Madness

A short-lived surge of itch, prickling, and irritability that hits about 24–48 hours after a close shave, as stiff regrowing stubble and freshly sensitized skin team up to drive you into a slight frenzy. Typically lasts 1–4 days.

“Day-two Beard Madness has me wanting to claw my face off.”

by TwistedBobbay August 29, 2025

soft-bearded man

A man or manchild(usually a millennial) that has a beard but most likely gets it trimmed weekly. This man gets offended very easily, and violently opposes hate speech. He would not dare use his hands for manual labor or for properly pleasing a woman. He is a feminist, his wife makes more money than him, and he hates white privilege.

"Hey I heard Lumberjack Leslie has to ask his wife before he does anything!" "Yeah, he's a soft-bearded man."

by Scranton Strangler April 14, 2018

Bearded Cave

Way of saying hairy vagina.

Jamie had a bearded cave inside her panties and needed to trim it.

by Kev22Wilt October 7, 2015

National Ugly Beard Day

On December 23, the barber shops are free for ugly beards.

Happy National Ugly Beard Day!

by sg_10 November 3, 2021

vomit beard

When you vomit so much that it covers the outside of your mouth and looks like a beard.

Eric: "Dude, I got so drunk last night!"
Paul: "Yeah, I saw pictures on Facebook. You even had a vomit beard."
Eric: "What?!"

by Goonie Jenkins January 30, 2014

queermo beard

(n.) - the collection of hair that grows on your face, usually resembles something that of a homosexual elmo.

Oh man! look at that dude, he's got a queermo beard.

Ii man you got one queermo beard.

by QueensCream November 14, 2011

360 beard

When your missus decides to over shave your neck and your beard overtime conjoins with your hairline at the back of your head!!

Look at the result of my wife's great work, I now have a 360 beard!!!!

by The crafty cutie March 24, 2019