10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag

the phrase "10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag" refers to an obese, large or overweight person in the kind of clothing you would expect to see a track star, or a member or a swim team wearing while competing.

Jane - "What is Haneefa wearing?"
Jill - "I think she got lost in Marshalls and bought clothes from the children's aisle by accident. Either that or she's color blind and has some serious depth perception issues"
Jane - "Haneefa looks like 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag."
Jill - "Right on!"

by Craker Jack March 12, 2013

I would rather shit on my hands and clap

When someone would like you to go, do or attend something you rather wouldn't.

Friend: hey do you wanna go for a Nandos?
Me: I would rather shit on my hands and clap.

by Drbigman May 28, 2016

she knows where her shit gets buttered

Referring to a female, or occasionally male, who knows where to go for the best deal, opportunity, lifestyle, and does so.

"I kicked her out and she went crawling back to you - she knows where her shit gets buttered!"

by Slic Ric September 10, 2013

Cunt-Munching-Shit-Surfing-Pee-Fucking-Twatwaffle

One who walks around without underwear on and get's an angry red waffle like pattern on their vagina, has a urine and shit fetish, and is either a lesbian or an extremely horny man. (Cunt Munching)

"Dude, where is that bitch Sara?"

"Ugh... You invited that Cunt-Munching-Shit-Surfing-Pee-Fucking-Twatwaffle?"

"Just because she's a lesbian whore that doesn't wear underwear you don't need to call her that... that's low."

by Aerospring98051 July 7, 2009

you aint got shit on my bling

A phrase used by white trash females usually with two-tone hair(skunks)who think they are "all that", but are acually pathetic import driving losers. It is ironically used to show their dominance of other females when in fact they couldn't dominate a dog turd in either looks or intelligence.

As she passed Audrey, Colene remarked: "you aint got shit on my bling"

by The big BK January 11, 2009

King Kong Aint Got Shit On Me

Most people think this phrase originated from the movie training day. However it really originated from Dave Chappelle: True Hollywood stories- Rick James

"I'm Rick James bitch! Everybody! King Kong Aint Got Shit On Me

by Oaju July 11, 2010

I don't know if I need a shit or a haircut

Originally Northern Irish, this expression shows confusion. As in:

(1) I'm so drunk I don't know if I need a shit or a haircut!
(2) What the fuck are you talking about?! You don't know if you need a shit or a haircut!

by Bobby8585 July 30, 2008