How in the fuck did I get home just now?

I'm walking home from work just now, and I walk out the door... Step down the hill onto the side walk... And I zone out COMPLETELY. I don't remember walking across the intersection... I don't remember crossing the train tracks... I don't remember turning the corner... I look up and I can already see my apartment.

Hym "How in the fuck did I get home just now? I can usually recall walking past some of the milestones I use to, like, keep track of my progress but this time... What the fuck happened just there? I just skipped like 80% of my walk. I... Are you trying to kill me? I lost like a full 30 minutes just there. I mean, it was 730 when I started writing this... I pooped and showered... Rubbed one out... The walk home only takes 10 minutes... I'm missing like 30 minutes. What the fuck is happening there? Randy didn't show up today... So THAT was weird... What the fuck is happening there? I mean AS SOON as I stepped on the sidewalk it's like I skipped the next 8 minutes forward in time... And then I'm still missing 22 minutes... Hmmm... Are YOU doing that? Time is all fucked today."

by Hym Iam March 9, 2025

did i asked

when a people says something then someone replys with "did i asked" or "did i ask"...

Human 1: i have a dog in my house
Human 2: did i asked
Human 1: no but i dont really care mother fucker

by Makayu February 7, 2022

Pannan i baren

when you fall asleep, especially in the bar

sven: oh no where is christina
torkel: Oh no she has pannan i baren and the clock is only 2 am:(

by Knarkulina May 30, 2022

<.7.9.7.6.>Your Mother Talks So Much In <&>AndA<&>Out Of Her Mouth That, I, Angel Jose Robles Thought That The Mother Swallowed A Carrot<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>Your Mother Talks So Much In <&>AndA<&>Out Of Her Mouth That, I, Angel Jose Robles Thought That The Mother Swallowed A Carrot<.7.9.7.6.>

<.7.9.7.6.>Your Mother Talks So Much In <&>AndA<&>Out Of Her Mouth That, I, Angel Jose Robles Thought That The Mother Swallowed A Carrot<.7.9.7.6.>

by TheGeneralGenitalsPranksterian May 16, 2025

I would eat a mile of your shit to smell your farts

A classic line to woo a woman, meaning that you would do whatever it takes to be close to her.

John saw her from across the room, she was beautiful, he wanted to know her. He downed a vodka and coke and casually made his way over to the bar to order another. "Voda and coke please" he said to the barman. He took a silent but deep breath. "I've been watching you all evening and I would eat a mile of your shit to smell your farts." She smiled, and said "come on then lets go to the bathroom"

by green923jade January 9, 2021

i moon you

I moon you is a short way to say: I love you to the moon and back
Symbolizing: 「○」( in addition, 「○」also means I capture your vision )
- definition by ankyu안규

Thanks.

Darling, I moon you~

by N안규 April 29, 2018

I was in fear of my safety

I was in fear of my safety is a term commonly used as a blanket defense by a police or law enforcement officer to justify use of force against a civilian or other person. Historically, this defense carries a very low burden of proof from the officer or department. ©2021/Rdee

I was in fear of my safety so I shot the suspect in the back

by Rdee_ April 18, 2021