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If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard

Da "parody on da cake-baking saying" remark dat you smilingly say to a cute chick whom you've unexpectedly met somewhere, and you are savoringly pressing her soft warm palms against yer fuzzy cheeks.
I always love joking around about, "If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard" wif pretty girls whom I befriend; said humorous remark always gets da biggest amused giggle-fits outta dem.
by QuacksO October 22, 2023
mugGet the If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beardmug.

salted his beard

The act of tricking innocent homeless men into ejaculating various bodily fluids into a fake beard worn by the assailants.
the Beard is then dried, removed and dipped into cooking pots at a later date to add a matured salty taste.
Extra points are given if the contributors have different venereal diseases and Connor can milk them to satisfaction without waking them. Although consciousness is optional but not encouraged.
Did you taste Connor’s goulash last Friday night?? Tasted like he’s been salted his beard again. Anyways. My doctor says this gonorrhea around my mouth should clear up if I keep taking these antibiotics. But these genital warts are here to stay.
by JesusBummedTrump August 8, 2023
mugGet the salted his beardmug.

Jack's Crazy Beard

The kind of beard you get when you come back from the secret island and go a little crazy and start listening to Nirvana really loud while driving around in a van.
Damn dude, where have you been? You've got a serious Jack's Crazy Beard going on! Also, nice van.
by Malachi Constant April 12, 2019
mugGet the Jack's Crazy Beardmug.

cheesy beard

When you get face fucked and the jizz solidifies to form a beard. Ferment for extra enjoyment.
I face fucked your mum last night. By the end she had a cheesy beard upstairs and down.
by Cheesybearddudr May 28, 2017
mugGet the cheesy beardmug.

beard drool

The pussy juice that is dripping off of a man with a beard.
I made her cum so hard while eating her pussy that I ended up with beard drool.
by DaJRizzle February 5, 2023
mugGet the beard droolmug.

Heil's Beard

a type of moss, also known as horse-hair moss or old mans beard. If it is on a person it is your beard that grows insanely fast and connects with your chest hair.
Look at that guy he has a Heil's Beard!, look at that heil's beard growing on that tree!
by MiltownHSchool July 8, 2011
mugGet the Heil's Beardmug.

brass chops beard oil

Sold by a Sexy Trumpet Boi from Portsmouth west Schools.
I Bought some brass chops beard oil to help my beard
by Pillsbarrythiccman45 May 31, 2018
mugGet the brass chops beard oilmug.

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