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Poon Goon

Someone who claims to have sex with a lot of women, but in actuality spends most of his time trolling the internet, playing video games, or looking at porn so he can talk about the female anatomy.
Example 1

Friend 1: yo I got caught up in a threesome with two chicks the other night, it was great.
Friend 2: shut up man everybody knows you're a total Poon Goon.

Example 2
Guy: Hey girl, you wanna see why all the ladies get with me?
Girl: Oh please you are the biggest Poon Goon I've ever seen, salty lil' introvert!
by Johnny Tsunami Bro January 28, 2017
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Blame it on the goon

This means you are blaming it on a animal or items.
Don’t blame it on the goon the Dog didn’t do it.
by Emilyrayann April 23, 2018
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Gummy Goon

A toothless freak. A person who for what ever reason has no teeth and gums his words when talking to you. A person who's mouth sinks in because he should be wearing dentures but is not.
He gummed his words as he yelled, spitting and drooling all over me. He was a real gummy goon.
by tammy yammy from miami August 12, 2016
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looks gooning

cumming on your own face and rubbing it in
Oh your skin looks so good what moisturizer do you use

Well I’ve been looks gooning

So… Cum?

Yes
by RCFMO August 29, 2024
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nelly-gooning

When Joshua Nelhams reaches the state of goon-tosis and becomes one with the universe.
Bro have you seen nelly-gooning, what a legend
by Nelly-Hater February 16, 2024
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Canaanite Flicker Gooning

The sacred art of flicking one's penis or clitoris between strokes or rubs, altering between flicks and rubs. This achieves a rhythm so divine that it promises a state of unparalleled pleasure. The term draws inspiration from the biblical promise of the land of Canaan to Abraham—a covenant of fulfillment and maximum goon pleasure and volume.

In this context, however, the "land of milk and honey" is less about geography and more about the boundless euphoria found in perfectly synchronized flicks and strokes. Legend holds that even G-d sits in the celestial cuck chair, edging while marveling at the ingenuity of its own creation's ability to out-goon the holiest of holy.

Practitioners believe this technique ensures maximum engagement with the pleasure centers, occupying the body and mind as fully as an ancient prophecy fulfilled.

Truly, it is a modern pilgrimage for the devoted in gooning.
USAGE 1:

Brian: Yo, where’s Dave? We’re trying to run this trio in valo rn, and he’s not responding!

James: Oh, it’s Shabbat. You know how he gets. He’s probably deep into his daily Canaanite Flicker Gooning. Something about “honoring the ancestors” while also achieving “maximum occupation of pleasure.” He’ll be back after he’s, uh, spiritually fulfilled?

USAGE 2:

Sammi: Where the hell is Sarah? We’re all waiting for her to pick a movie, and she’s MIA.

Jessica: Bruh, it’s Friday night. You already know she’s deep in her Canaanite Flicker Gooning session—probably ass-naked on her bed, double-flicking like she’s summoning ancient spirits. She says it’s about “embracing divine pleasure” or some shit, but let’s call it what it is: she’s just trying to goon herself into the promised land of milk, honey, and whatever else she can squirt out.

Sammi: Honestly, fair. If I could flick my bean into a transcendent coma, y’all wouldn’t see me on movie nights either.
by 000Six_Six000 December 10, 2024
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Goon

A U.S. citizen who participates in military style firearms and tactical training in order to be proficient in combat. Whether to defend the U.S. mainland from foreign invasion or potential government tyranny.
by Goon1776 August 18, 2022
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