jesus abs

having perfectly sculpted abs that make any one jaw drob at the sight of the goodly gift

Shishoka: Matt what are yo...... (jaw falls to the floor)

Matt: oh hey babe just working on my JESUS ABS.

Shishoka: oglasoagla..............

by face cake December 30, 2011

Chocolate Jesus

A formed chocolate bar in the shape of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ

I gave that self rightious preachy fat bitch a chocolate Jesus for Christmas. She loved it and then ate Christ's head.

by [e-mail] December 24, 2004

Jesus Christ

An exclamation gemerally used to express anguish or dismay.

Jim: Some mo fo just keyed your ride dude !
Bob: JESUS CHRIST ! !

or

In poker your straight loses to a full house and you exclaim JESUS CHRIST ! !

by MDog221 July 15, 2006

pull a jesus

1. When someone accomplishes something in a way that seems miraculous.
2. When someone tries to resolve a disagreement using jesus or the bible to back him/her up.

1. They thought he died in that weird cloning experiment but he pulled a jesus.
2. He was really pissed, but then she tried to pull a jesus on him and made it even worse.

by SabMaster February 4, 2010

Golden Jesus

Pure pharmaceutical grade heroin (diacetylmorphine).

The term was first coined in the autobiographical book `Candy´ by Luke Davies (and subsequently the movie `Candy´ starring Heath Ledger and Abbie Cornish), when the character Casper (Geoffrey Rush) a lecturing chemist & sometime opiate user synthesizes his own `Golden Jesus´ (diacetylmorphine) from Panadine Forte.

by Chemgirl January 3, 2010

Man-Jesus

A man who is superior to yourself in several ways (either perceived or otherwise), who is currently dating a woman you are interested in. When he is better looking/smarter/wealthier/more educated/more adventurous than you are, he represents an idealized version of manhood or a picture of maleness that other men are expected to reach but realistically have little chance of doing. Hence, he is an example of Man-Jesus.

Yeah, I'd ask her out...but you've never met her boyfriend. He's Man-Jesus, I don't measure up.

by NachtKreiger August 3, 2010

pulled a jesus

Surprising someone because they thought you were dead, or, more commonly, being gone for a long time and suddenly show up unannounced.

Guy 1: "Hey, you're back!"
Guy 2: "Yeah, I pulled a Jesus."

by Wartooth June 24, 2008