Ex-boyfriend Disease

Ex-boyfriend Disease, otherwise known as Pompous Ass Disease. Warning symptoms include heart palpitations, diarrhea, severe headaches and a compulsive need to flee the country. There are many specimens that have been known to be infectious. If you happen to come in contact with one, back away slowly, avoid eye contact, and disinfect immediately!

Woman: I ran into Roger today..
Woman's friend: That bastard! And you had just stopped having diarrhea.

Woman: I know...I tried to run but he was too fast. Next thing I know, I have the sudden urge to live in Australia and go to the bathroom.

Woman's friend: You poor thing, I know quite a bit how you feel. I contracted Ex-boyfriend disease from Jake a year ago. The diarrhea comes and goes just thinking about it.

by MonkeyBubbles July 13, 2017

Jim Spratt's Disease

Jim Spratt's disease is a progressive neurodegenerative disease that affects nerve cells in the anal or oral cavity depending on the contact you made with Jim Spratt. Most recipients of Jim Spratt's Disease are celebrities and singing sensations from the early 1970s. After first contact with James "aka Jim" Spratt you will initially experience the following symptoms: muscle weakness, problems with coordination, stiff muscles, loss of muscle, muscle spasms, or overactive reflexes, difficulty speaking, vocal cord spasm, or impaired voice, fatigue or feeling faint, difficulty swallowing, drooling, lack of restraint, mild cognitive impairment, severe constipation, severe unintentional weight loss, shortness of breath, or difficulty raising the foot. You will eventually succumb to some form of cancer from Jim Spratt's Disease, usually anal or oral cancer.

Farrah Fawcett died from complications of Jim Spratt's Disease.

by SgtSpratt November 18, 2017

the ooh shiney disease

You are in a middle of a conversation and you see something shiney so you stop dead conversation and point it out.

She has the ooh shiney disease because she seen it sparkle.

by Naynau February 21, 2018

Lames Disease

A severe sickness related to ones social health. This disease is characterized by both boring and lazy attitudes towards anything related to interacting with people and staying by themselves every night of the week. People with this disease will typically create elaborate lies just to get out of spending time with friends, some of those include; Creating a fake job, fake significant others, fake family reunions, and fake financial issues among other things.

Andrew's Lames Disease must be flaring up, he told us ain't coming to play ball because he has to work but I heard he got fired weeks ago.

by RBSmoove March 12, 2018

DisEASE

Ease in disease, when your sickness is going down and your sickness seems to be going away.

Todd: Hey is Sarah still have that sad disease?
John: Yeah she's getting the EASE in the Disease.

by Dark storker March 11, 2017

Bucklandnism Disease

A disorder which makes you bitch and become a rotten, cold, Lying, and a spoiled rich whore. Side effects may include Cat Abuse, Giving Chihuahuas liquors and AK 47's, Pissing your Local Mexican Off, and Pretending to be the ultimate Weeaboo in front of your Japanese obsessed friends. If you suffer from any of these symptoms please consult with a real doctor and not one selling condoms for 99 cents.

Michael: Hey My Daughter is suffering from Bucklandnism Disease is there a cure for this stuff?
Doctor: Sorry Mr. Michael Thompson I can't help you right now. There are things that I can do and there are things that I can't do.
Michael: So you're basically saying my daughter is fucked up for life?
Doctor: Unless She stop Snorting Coffee Beans and being a Freaking Whore maybe I can give you a call.
Michael: NOOOOOO! Doctor I need you to Cure the Bucklandnism Disease
Doctor: Fuck this shit, Michael I'm Heading to Hawaii! You're nothing but a crazy bastard.

by Arika Cho cho Butterface March 18, 2017

Connor disease

A disease of falling in love with Connor Franta deeply until you stalk and save every photo he has.

OMG, Connor Franta is so cute! I can't take it anymore, I think i have Connor disease.

by MapleT June 22, 2016