Admiral Crunch

Eating Captain Crunch cereal with rum poured over it, for a mature taste.

Stephen Colbert enjoys eating Admiral Crunch cereal.

by This is not a definition June 11, 2009

La-Z-boy ferret crunch

The #1 cause of premature death for ferrets.

THIS IS NOT A JOKE.

HUSBAND: Hey, honey, have you seen Freddy the ferret?

WIFE: No, sugar, I haven't.

HUSBAND: I've been looking for him for an hour -- I don't know where he could be. Oh, well, I guess I'll just sit down and watch some ESPN.

(Sits down, everything is fine. Then reclines -- SqueeKRUNCH! Very sadly, the La-Z-boy ferret crunch has taken another ferret life before it's time.)

HUSBAND: Oh my God! It's Freddy! Dear God...

OZZY: Don't let this happen to you.

by Ozzy Nelson, peTrainer May 30, 2006

Neo-Crunch

hipster term for post-Garcia hippies promoting idealism for a new century.

Don't confuse the Neo-Crunches with the hippies; they smoke weed out of glass pipes, not graphix bongs.

by DR. DEL ONE January 24, 2008

Coffee Crumpet

The anus.

It looks like that fellow's coffee crumpet has taken a firm pummelling.

Have you seen the size of that coffee crumpet?

by Redeeris November 2, 2010

number crunch

an estimate, usually using percentages

"Are we hanging tonight?" "Maybe" "Give me a number crunch"

by Gaaaron November 18, 2013

Louisiana Crunch Cake

When a man takes a shit on someone’s chest then he cum’s onto the shit and then they both consume it. After the cum is applied it should resemble a Louisiana crunch cake😸

“Woah man last night I totally dropped a Louisiana crunch cake on Sarah’s chest and SHE ATE IT”

by pinkpeppercorns August 14, 2019

Punch the Crunch

to wake up and masturbate while eating breakfast cereal (usually Cap'n Crunch or Cap'n Crunch with Crunchberries)

Every morning I wake up so hungry and horny that I just want to punch the crunch in the breakfast nook.

by Diamond Dave Cousins September 3, 2010