the doctor diagnosed me with cooch crumpets
by hgffff March 27, 2019
Another male masturbating game similar to soggy biscuit, but much worse as the target is now a crumpet (a much more absorbent vessel). Participants must circle jerk onto the crumpet. Whoever comes first is deemed the winner and the loser must eat the cum-loaded crumpet.
by yoshi12 October 09, 2014
A nice “bit of crumpet” who is gourmet in her sexual flexiblitly: in particular, receiving pleasure by watching and facilitating her man in to a ménage a trois. And/or is orally fixated.
.oh Mella ..shes amazing and loves watching me fuck other girls and joining in just at the right moment to get us all to cum at the same time... she really is Gourmet Crumpet.
by Oblique Geek January 12, 2018
by He8i3 May 04, 2022
by Jhintop April 25, 2019
The performer of the art of basting crumpets such there are , were crumpet means snatch or pussy, applied by 'wisking' or gently oscillating fingeritively solids into liquids, thus creating a type of vacuum that no man can escape.
We have a cold newby in this porn scene....we will require our best crumpet baster to liquify the vaginal butter into a softy cream in the shortest amount of time....stat.
by Ball splat November 08, 2019
He had an English crumpet for breakfast
by Dr.seemorevaginas December 08, 2013