Crappervention

When your own shit is telling you that you are out of control. Somebody whose shit is so out of control that unbeknownst to them they are walking around with severe shit stains on their pants …..not to be confused with skid marks….these stains are so severe crap is oozing out the back of your pants and can be seen by any unfortunate individual standing or walking behind you. This type of intervention is most common amongst substance abusers and others afflicted with mental diseases that distort ones perceptions of reality. When faced with a Crappervention, the individual frequently responds with steadfast denial and assert they simply need to apply a little deodorant. Realistically they have not bathed, showered, changed their clothes, or wiped their own ass for days! The only cure for this condition is getting one’s shit under control…e.g….sobriety and/or taking medication as prescribed by a licensed physician. Please help spread the word, children of god, if you see shit creeping out of the back of your pants, listen to and trust what your shit is telling you, it is time to stop and park your ass at the nearest rehab facility.

Wife: Ralph you need to pull your shit together.

Ralph: I don’t know what you are talking about there is nothing wrong with me. You are simply looking for faults…picking on me….you ungrateful bitch!!

Wife: Ralph I just went to throw your pants in the wash and there were shit stains bleeding through the butt….OMFG you wore those things to work on Monday I certainly hope your boss and colleagues didn’t notice. Dude I think you just had a Crappervention!

Ralph: No I didn’t …..That is simply a skid mark….you’re so exaggerating bitch!!

by For Real2 July 13, 2011

craporabilia

All the cool stuff you've been collecting cuz "someday it's gonna be worth a fortune on eBay" or "I can't wait to show this to my kids."

Items can range from ticket stubs, to eight track tapes, to shoeboxes of old letters, to your original Chucks Taylors.

Also known as the reason for garages, attics, and basements.

Related to packrattiude.

Known cures include fire, flood and death and the need to decorate several hundred Cracker Barrels and Hard Rock Cafes.

Spouse: Wtf! Are we moving these boxes of craporabilia AGAIN? This shit weighs a ton and you never use it.

Spouse: My LIFE is in those boxes. I want our daughter to have my patched pants. And those World's Fair mugs are worth a FORTUNE!

by EmmaSez January 23, 2009

Crapper

Named after the inventor of the modern toilet, Thomas Crapper of England

I need to use the crapper.

by lenny May 13, 2005

Crappers

British Navy slang for being incredibly drunk.

"I woke up with the Captain's wife this morning"
"You must have been completely Crappers last night"

by Satandog March 30, 2006

Tap Crapper

Describes a person who is so paranoid that someone might hear them crapping, that they turn on the tap to drown out the sound of dookies hitting the toilet.

Larry: "where's Dave?"
Tom: "Oh, he's still in the bathroom. Got the tap on and everything, he's such a tap crapper."
Larry: "The man has issues.."

by MiZZ EEL June 20, 2008

crapper clapper

A man who, while performing anal sex, smacks the ballsack against the ass making a clapping sound.

Mike has huge balls. He is a crapper clapper.

by Crapper clapper December 20, 2016

tub crapper

When a person gets too large for a conventional toilet bowl and has to crap in a bath tub.

I bet that fat dude is a tub crapper

by smollenkopf October 3, 2008