Life Mistress

The friend you pick up after you drop off your girlfriend; the interaction between you is not a sexual one, but she could destroy you with the information she's gathered about your life.

Hey life mistress, remember when you ran to get me more beer even though you couldn't walk? I'm sure glad my girlfriend was asleep

by Stonee November 2, 2010

Medical Mistress

1. A married doctor's love interest

2. A married doctor's love interest who coaxes said doctor to separate/divorce his wife to be with her (mistress)

A medical mistress is whomever a male doctor cheats on his wife with or leaves his wife for

by Orenn May 12, 2013

Northern Line Mistral

The rush of delivery across the face and in the hair as felt by the service end of a hand job upon delivery of payload.

“Following a rather pleasant hand job from the wife she remained in the agreed relief posture, on her knees in front of me like a Mumbai Street Child, as I delivered the money shot. Having been a good couple of days since Dave & the twins were deployed in anger the volume of delivery was ample and it blew across her face and through her hair as if she had just stepped from the tube into the underground labyrinth that is the subterranean Waterloo and felt the first rush of the Northern Line Mistral.”

by furball69 April 22, 2010

galaxy minstrel

A measure of how many chocolate confections one can secrete under one's foreskin without causing either a) extreme pain; or b) flesh to tear. An average is three. The maximum is six.

Beginners should start with Tic-tacs before moving onto M&Ms. Shoving a bag of Galaxy Minstrels up your foreskin is advanced stuff.

And remember to perform your stretches first.

I was admiring my physique in Asda when I noticed a patch of blood on the front of my lycra shorts. My foreskin had only gone and ripped again hadn't it?

by McGoohan March 22, 2005

Good Mistress

A whore that know the rules of being a worthless tramp. SHe knows that the married man she is screwing has zero respect for her, knows he only want/needs her for sex and "dirty" sex, this mistress also knows that the man will never leave his wife for a slut like herself. She knows her place that wife is always first. The mistress also knows that 1 day a week, no phone calls, no texting, no messages IS the only way to go.
The MOST important rule is to KEEP YOUR DAMN MOUTH SHUT! If a whore forgets even 1 rule, they are not a good mistress. If the whore forgets and talks about the affair she deserves to have the wife whoop her ass AND public humiliation so everyone who will listen will know what a worthless deviod human being you really are!

Man "ya, girl.......your such a good mistress, my wife won't suck my cock after I put it in her ass!"

"Thanks, sweetie for keeping your mouth closed when my wife called you, now open it and do what a good mistress does!"

"Shut up whore, I told you NOT to call my house you are NOT a good mistress!!"

by MikeytheTRUTH December 10, 2009

Minstrel

An incredibly dense piece of shit

Aw mate, I was shitting minstrels last night

by Lil Nish June 9, 2018

mistress america

A java teacher who is a very hairy for a female. Now some girls are hairy, but mistress america is on the same level of hairy as big foot or robin williams. The only difference between her and big foot big foot smells better, and knows more about computers. She is a poor teacher, and a hairy fuckin freak.

I cant see the difference between mistress america and big foot, but the smell gives mistress america away.

by Lordpiggyinton May 3, 2005