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crunch monkey

Someone who eats like an animal. They chew with their mouth open, crunch loudly, talk with their mouth open, and are completely oblivious that they do it.
Mike: Dude...Jen is such a crunch monkey.
Bob: I can even see what she ate for breakfast!
by Mikizzle May 1, 2006
mugGet the crunch monkeymug.

blunder crunching

Combination of "blunder" and "number crunching," describing the exasperating experience of trying to figure out which supermarket item is giving you more for your money on a dollar per ounce basis.

A lot of times these days supermarkets will break down the cost per ounce right on the face of the shelf price tag. However, sometimes you find yourself blundering through basic algebra, trying your best to hold your own. Forget about it if you're trying to convert between grams and ounces: you're just done, and you'll make your decision on some other factor.

If you have your phone with you, you can use the calculator function to avoid blunder crunching. In no case, however, must you mumble to yourself out loud as you try to do the calculations.
Don't be the guy mumbling to himself while trying to decide between Starkist tuna or the store brand. Keep your blunder crunching as private as possible.
by Ae5Ea8 April 6, 2015
mugGet the blunder crunchingmug.

Dutch Crunch

A Dutch Crunch is a sexual act in which the female slams her buttocks upon the males testicles before he is about to climax.
Nicolas: man! I don’t know if I’ll ever reproduce!

Kyle: What happened bro?

Nicolas: Dude! Last night Cynthia gave me the ol’ dutch crunch. Totally rocked my world.

Kyle: You’re a freak bro.....
by DirtSquizzeral September 1, 2018
mugGet the Dutch Crunchmug.

Smuckernut Crunch

A deadly triple threat of peanut butter and jelly on a crunchy granola bar. More specifically, skippy, smucker's, and nature valley.
A: dude, are you in the mood for a smuckernut crunch ?
B: hell yea mann. so clutch.
by smuckernut July 21, 2010
mugGet the Smuckernut Crunchmug.

Double Crunch

A Double Crunch is when you suck dick on a beach and he has a sandy penis but you’re no quitter
1. Samantha : I was sucking his dick at the beach and it was too sandy.

Chole : did you quit ?
Samantha : I double crunched that dick , i ain’t no quitter
by UrMumInMyBed July 15, 2018
mugGet the Double Crunchmug.

crunch munch

When you eat someone’s pubic hairs like they are crunch munch popcorn.
“Dude, last night I ate so much crunch munch that I started to feel sick.”
by YummyGummies October 13, 2017
mugGet the crunch munchmug.

Crunch Snap

A term you use in a poetry class
by loljazzi February 5, 2020
mugGet the Crunch Snapmug.

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