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finding jesus

A abosolutely hilarious ripoff of finding Nemo. just look at the damn front cover y'all.
AYO IS THAT FINDING JESUS?!
by G520 April 24, 2023
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Jesus straps

"hook and loop" straps (note: the originals are known as "velcro")

these straps contain and manage cords, cables, ropes...e.t.c. , keeping them from catching on anything and everything,
or transforming themselves into a tangled mass! (or wrapping themselves around "the baby's" NECK !!)

the natural law is: when carrying ANYTHING (like a tv) the dangling cord will catch itself solidly on something, where one has to 'break stride' to get it free. this would NEVER happen in 5,000 tries at throwing the cord at the offending catch point! it ONLY catches when carrying something unsecured!
be right with you! , godda find a way to contain this cord! (response:) try this Jesus strap !

when setting up the PA, the previously attached Jesus straps saved my black ass !

what kind of idiot doesn't secure a cord ?? -Jesus straps your savior, infant!
by michael foolsley April 14, 2022
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Jesus Pimple

A Pimple which comes back a few days later after it is popped.
Dude, the pimple I popped three days ago has come back to life. Damn, Jesus Pimple.
by Jireh July 25, 2012
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zoidberg Jesus

the one true messiah. the great dr zoidberg Jesus
by the-great-jet December 1, 2021
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jesus lugo

My man Jesus Lugo is simply built differently. So it is justifiable as to why he went 140 on a school zone
by Luzzo October 18, 2020
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jesus chode

when someone has a chode so fat juicy and delicious that Jesus himself must have a try
wow jonathan has a jesus chode, i could barely fit it in my mouth its so thick
by grannychodeman February 5, 2019
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speeding-Jesus

A car passing you while you are speeding. This car will most likely get stopped by the police instead of you. Thus, they sacrifice themselves for your speeding sins.
Thank you speeding-Jesus; I can keep driving fast now, as long as you are in front of me. Speeding-Jesus take wheel.
by heathcat June 15, 2019
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