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plague monkey

An employee who still comes in to work sick and spreads his germs all over the place when he should stay home.
Bob came in to work sicker than a plague monkey just to get his work done. Now everybody is going to get sick.
by Roy Mulders May 20, 2007
mugGet the plague monkeymug.

Batch Monkey

(n.) Commonly used to describe disgruntiled business owners that are unaware of the procedures needed to be taken in order to get paid from a credit card terminal, software, or POS device...

Most people who are "Batch Monky's" tend to believe that if they pay a monthly fee to run credit cards, it's everyones else responsibility to make certain they get money in THEIR pockets.
-- "You guys have no idea how to do your job, I haven't gotten a deposit in 3 weeks!! WTF is wrong with you assholes. I WANT MY MONEY NOW!! I pay you guys every month, WHERE'S MY MONEY?!"

--"Well, sir/ma'am it's standard credit card processing procedure that you close your batch every evening after business, you're missing $34,596.94 as a deposit?! Simply close your batch!"

--"No one told me that I had to do that! Okay, I'll press the CLOSE BATCH button next time, THANKS... Goodbye"

--"Thank you for calling anyway...(click) you Batch Monkey Ass MothaFucka, do MY job. Heh!"
by ALKAIZER June 25, 2009
mugGet the Batch Monkeymug.

silly monkey

This is commonly known as a teasing name used to refer to someone who quite often does things that make the common person go "WTF" and literally "LOL".
Why? Zzz...you bore me because your not a silly monkey.
Waizee
by lol101 August 6, 2009
mugGet the silly monkeymug.

Faction Monkey

Some dumb mother fucker who uses online pee pee poo poo internet drama to make themselves feel like their cock is bigger. Can typically be found on Roblox games like The Wild West, and will try to argue over who is b
Nobody cares about the battle you were at faction monkey, shut the fuck up and get a life.
by cobalt_rock May 14, 2021
mugGet the Faction Monkeymug.

monkey rape

when a monkey bends you over and you just sit there and take it yeaaa you like that whispers the monkey you wanna say no but you know you love it yeaa num num.
dude i just got monkey raped...it it hurt
mugGet the monkey rapemug.

stress monkey

One who behaves like a panicked monkey when placed under minimal stress.
In retail, there are always times when checkout lines get full. Stress monkeys pull everyone to registers when they have two customers in line and everything else remains undone at the end of the day.
by Dr. Bubba January 24, 2010
mugGet the stress monkeymug.

Howling Monkey

When a girl gives 2 handjobs and a blowjob at the same time to 3 different guys
Dude Amy gave me Jim and Andy a Howling Monkey last night
by Kpahx October 28, 2010
mugGet the Howling Monkeymug.

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