The Italian Birthday

When you go to an upscale restaurant in a major city with a strict dress code (the kind of place that lends out a jacket to the sap that forgot his at home) without a jacket, a ridiculously colored pair of pants, and an obnoxious bow tie or better yet in shorts, flip flops and no tie, either way with your sleeves rolled up. You then manage somehow to be seated against the establishment's policies. Shortly thereafter you are sung happy birthday in Italian by a portly employee. For additional fun, go to the bathroom all the way across the restaurant in your shorts, thereby giving everyone a second look at your audacity.

Guy 1: She didn't tell me the place would be so fancy. I was insanely underdressed.
Guy 2: So, what'd you do?
Guy 1: What any man would do. I went in there, met her dad and brother, and pulled The Italian Birthday.
Guy 2: How'd that turn out?
Guy 1: Oh they hate me, but it was funny as hell.

by R-Dizawg July 20, 2013

Italian butt flush

When you pee in someone’s butt. A pee enema.

NOT a natural solution to constipation.

“I was constipated, so my boyfriend gave me an Italian butt flush. That was a mistake.”

by Daddy’s Bunny November 7, 2021

Italian roulette

A culinary game of chance where you mix premium Italian pasta with mystery pasta discovered in the darkest depths of your pantry or even the neighborhood bin shed. The result is a dish that could either transport you to the piazzas of Rome with its exquisite taste or send you on a flavor adventure that rivals a rollercoaster ride.

Side Effects May Include:

Pasta Time Warp: You might find yourself temporarily fluent in Italian or spontaneously humming opera arias.

Sudden Chef Syndrome: After consumption, you might feel an overwhelming urge to critique the cooking techniques of famous chefs on TV.

Spaghetti Serendipity: Occasionally, you may discover a hidden talent for culinary innovation, inventing new pasta shapes or sauces that defy culinary logic.

Parmesan Paradox: Your fridge may suddenly overflow with an inexplicable surplus of Parmesan cheese, causing a delightful yet mysterious phenomenon.

Carbonara Confusion: You might start debating passionately with friends about the "authentic" way to prepare carbonara, even if you've never been to Italy.

Feeling adventurous, Chris decided to play Italian roulette for dinner—he mixed some gourmet fettuccine with a questionable bag of pasta he found near the bin shed. Now he's convinced he can speak fluent Italian and has an inexplicable craving for more Parmesan cheese!

by pastaiolo August 2, 2024

italian bull

When you're fucking a girl in the ass while pulling her hair and yell another girls name and see how long you can hold on before she throws you off.

Last night I was having sex with my girlfriend and pulled the Italian bull

by BlueWombat69er September 21, 2013

Italian Tanks

Italian shitboxes that were deployed on the battlefields during World War II, notably lacking in firepower, armor, and overall effectiveness compared to their german counterparts. Despite their limitations, Italian tanks such as the Fiat M13/40 and the Carro Armato series were deployed on various fronts, including North Africa and the Mediterranean, where they often faced formidable adversaries but struggled to make significant impacts due to their design flaws and inferior performance.

-Did you grind the Italian tech tree in War Thunder?

-Nah, I don't wanna deal with those Italian Tanks

by tf is a pseudonym?? February 11, 2024

italian heart attack

Fried lasagna

Mario was having a good time until out came the Italian Heart Attack

by LuigiNumberOne April 23, 2018

Italian Thank You

To suck somebody’s dick as a way to thank someone

Person 1: “did he at least thank him?”

Person 2: “yeah Italian Thank You and everything”

by Jaber2doodle May 30, 2025