This has nothing to do with asking.
Hym "So stop trying to make your point at me. I'm not going to and don't have to let you hold this over my head in exchange for compliance and if it's worth less than your kids life you can't possibly make an exchange that would benefit me enough to justify allowing you to control how I problem solve. You're being obtuse about asking for thing and I'm not going to indulge you. You want me to do something else and this isn't about what you want and I'm not going to let you turn this into 'Hym does what I want and gets rewarded or Hym does what Hym wants and gets punished.' And THAT is what you are trying to turn this into."
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