The Carpenters clutch

Walking around all day with the handle of your hammer buried in your anus to the head of the hammer.

Why does Ed look confused and a little uncomfortable? Asked Andy

He got a larger hammer, for the Carpenters clutch. Said George

by Sparky503 March 29, 2017

The Angry Carpenter

The Angry Carpenter - Tie your girlfriend to a workbench and proceed to use sandpaper upon her Vagina, once smooth feel free to have sex with the bloody remains

Poor mrs Jamison, she died from The Angry Carpenter.
she was such a good teacher. Damn sandpaper is rough.

by The Comic November 5, 2012

The Carpenter Effect

When a person or persons find themselves inexplicably drawn either a trilby, glasses a scarf or all of the above. This person will then want to molest everything that moves. A known symptom of the Carpenter effect also includes blaring classical music from hidden speakers around your body, some may also find themselves compelled to provide a 'tuneful' accompaniment. They will look a bit silly.

"Did you see Taylor Momsen the other day?"
"Yeah she was suffering from 'The Carpenter Effect'!"

by DuckmanThesecond August 18, 2013

Festival Carpenter

A type of person that worked back stage at a festival once and now thinks they're a certified
Carpenter

I really don't want to take him on, he's a festival carpenter and will be a pain in the arse thinking he knows it all and not listening
Add some tags below
Type a list of comma-separated tags...

by Spgr86 March 11, 2023

mr carpenter

best chili maker, creator of the catapult in nj, world famous pantie model, inventor of the nuclear bomb, and the greatest teacher of all time.

Mr carpenter won’t stop slaying, hes making everyone jealous.

Don’t cry, everyone is madly in love with mr Carpenter.

by oakpokesyourmom October 20, 2023

Sabrina Carpenter.

A blonde beauty.

I love Sabrina Carpenter.

by aku sayang January 15, 2024

Carpenter's delight

This is a "high school" term for a girl or woman who is flat as a board and easy to nail.

"Look at her. She's a reg'lar carpenter's delight."
"wuzzat?"
"Flat as a board an' easy to nail!"
"Huh huh huh!"

by Rex ex Machina April 11, 2023