Rubber Hosing

Having sex even though you are completely flaccid.
Middle Aged Man 1: How was your night with Martha? Did you use the sildenafil I gave you?

Middle Aged Man 2: Nope. We went Rubber Hosing.

Middle Aged Man 1: What the fuck.
by GiveMeGrape December 08, 2019
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Mastodon Hose

n. A very large penis.
I saw no way he was going to fit his Mastodon Hose inside me. Huge!
by saint_adventure October 03, 2014
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Broken Hose

What you may call a penis when a guy is peeing female-style.
When a guy is lazy, he may occasionally urinate in a sitting position, causing his penis to appear as a "broken hose", casually leaking into the toilet.
by eternaldoom September 12, 2011
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charge the hose

the point after mind over bladder fails and at which you have to piss so bad that to relieve pressure on your bladder you relax allowing pee to enter your weiner but you hold it by squeezing the end of it (with your fingers) until you can whip it out and take a proper piss.

think of a firefighter hooking up a fire hose to the fire hydrant. before they put out the fire, they have to open the valve and pressurize the hose, hence "charging the hose".
(on a road trip)

A. Pull over, I have to piss so bad!
B. How much time do I have?
A. None at all, I have to charge the hose!
B. Shit, you better grab that empty water bottle then, you are in deep trouble
by prick reuben October 04, 2011
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rubber hose

The act of going to the receiving end of a glory hole and pulling as hard as you can on someone's penis until it beings to look like a rubber garden hose
I was catching some dome at a glory hole when the asshole gripped and ripped. Made my shit look like a rubber hose
by Unusually Large Meat July 08, 2017
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You're hosed

"You're hosed." = "You're sh*t out of luck."
You are now in a hopeless position, with no known ways of escape or solution.
A polite way of saying "You have no hope."
"Hey Nick, my mother in law is coming to town next week. Any chance that one of your family members have died or something? Is there a funeral going on? I am really not trying to see her."
"Sorry John, unfortunately for you - no one has died. Looks like you're hosed."
by The guy who knows a lot. October 25, 2014
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Hose Wrangler

When you get your ass kicked by a waterhose while filling a waterbed.
by new1daga December 01, 2009
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