Don't wipe your ass before you shit

1.An expression you use to tell a person to stop bragging who claims victory before a brawl,race,match,competiion or any other event that has yet to happen.

A)
Kevin: let's see who has the speed to make it to the finish line quicker.

Eric: Man I got this,I'm gonna murk your ass!!

Kevin: Don't wipe your ass before you shit Eric ;it's not over till is over.

B)
Eric:10 bucks I get a better grade in my physics test?

BeHa: Man you always say that but you always fail,don't wipe your ass before shit!!!!

Jack: Yo Eric you ain't beating noone shut upp!!!

Mick: Yea don't wipe your ass before shit!!!

by BeHa February 20, 2011

you can go in dog shit, dingle balls

A phrase that can be used when one wants someone to leave, now, esp. if that someone is being annoying to the point of asking for a serious ass beating.

Annoying person: "give me something of value and I will go in peace"

person being annoyed: "you can go in dog shit, dingle balls, I've heard about enough out of you."

by wichita November 11, 2006

you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shit

the ridiculous condition of a winner politician who blames the former administrations, to justify the mere fact he is definitely unable.
Who does politics can choose the party to play with, the arguments to fight with, and the equivocal reasons to explain to the electorate, but can not choose the "favourite" priorities, budget deficits, environmental emergencies, and other embarrassing situations.

POLITICIAN: It's not my fault. The former mayor left a huge amount of budget deficit.
TV REPORTER (live): No, man: you can choose what you eat, you can not choose what you shit.

by logao November 4, 2018

You're making shit up because you though I was making shit up

Not what happened.

Hym "You're making shit up because you though I was making shit up. Your skeptical and attitude towards me and people like me is why you didn't believe me and not a lack of evidence and now you are trying to exclude me from a remedy that you only know you need because of me. This is not gratitude what you are doing here. You are trying to make it worse for me and I did not do that to you."

by Hym Iam December 5, 2025

did you just shit on my desk

a question asked directly after someone shits on a desk. this is specifically from southpark(like all offensive things) when cartmen shat on Mr. Mackeys desk

cartmen:*shits on desk*
Mr. Mackey:eric did you just shit on my desk?

by raybeez April 15, 2022

You think you the shit

if someone says this to you, they think you have a big ego. Like how Ice spice used it in her song 'Think U The Shit (Fart).'

Billy Billy Bob Joe: Wtf man, you tryna come up in my house and fuck around? You think you the shit.

Timmy: Cry about it lil ni-

by king himothy June 4, 2024

You aren't shit

And it doesn't matter what you know. Give up the screen shots that prove I created AI or you've signed a little girl's death warrant. You are not an authority and I do not have to abide you trying to use authority you don't have to meet out extra judicial "justice" you piece of shit.

Hym "You aren't consequence. You aren't shit. And you don't matter. And you getting involved here all but guarantees one of two things and neither of them are good for you. So, slow your fucking role. You AREN'T going to do shit. And I can say whatever the fuck I want you cocksuckers who the fuck do these freaks think they are?"

by Hym Iam September 3, 2025