Douche canoe

A fuckhead that is the size of a small boat.

My ex boss was such a douche canoe. She constantly lied about staff behind their back.

by Peaches&Boo January 10, 2017

two seater douche canoe

One who is filled so much with douche that it would fit inside a two seater canoe.

That kid is the biggest kind of jerk. One might call him a two seater douche canoe

by SwagBadger August 28, 2012

Douche canoe

An overboard term used to describe one who has only reached a standard level of douchyness. If one who has only reached the basic douche level is called a douche canoe, this person would consider it to be an insult. Upon being called a douche canoe, this person would likely become upset & act irrational. At this point, that person would have reached douche canoe standards & you will be justified in calling that person a douche canoe.

I.E. "i dumped my girlfriend because she was a real douche. After we broke up, she went all out "douche canoe."

by argonforrest October 22, 2014

Douche-canoe

Someone who puts their ex girl on his snap chat story for the new girl to see, and she gets mad. That new girl calls him a douche-canoe and proceeds to put a snap story of her own on that says "fuck you" in an act to subtweet his bitch ass

Wow he is such a douche-canoe, I hope his ex knows about me

by Big dick III July 15, 2015

Douche Canoe

A person, usually male, who you wish would row, row, row the fuck away from you.

OMG he is being so obnoxious for no reason, like first he is all nice and I think we will be friends, but now he is just being a douche canoe.

by adidasDUDE August 30, 2025

Douche canoe

A person who reaches the apex of douche baggery. This person is generally a loser that lives in a small town and act like he is a bad ass. Rumor has it that most Steve's are douche canoes, though douche canoes have other names as well. Rumor also has it that Steve's who are douche canoes also have a small penis which explains their napoleon complex.

Steve is such a douche canoe, there is no one in earth that compares. If there were Olympics that involved douche canoe racing, he would get the gold every time.

by Steveisabitchassdouchecanoe December 15, 2017

Douche Canoe

Someone, such as a business leader or head of school who makes a drastic change at the last minute that impacts the entire staff and gives 0 fucks about it.

T:"there is a safety issue with the building. What should we do?"
J:"extend the school year at the last minute of course!"
T:"perfect! Morale is low anyway, so fuck'em"

Staff:"wow....what a bunch of douche canoes"

by AlSnow June 12, 2023