I learned the clarinet at school

An innuendo alluding to the speaker's blowjob skills.

'I learned the clarinet at school.'
'I look forward to it.'

'Have sex with me.'
'Why should I?'
'Come on, I learned the clarinet at school.'
'COMING!'

by Johnlock November 4, 2012

Learned to play the clarinet at school

Gives fantastic blowjobs

So how is Jill at giving you a BJ, John?

Oh, she totally learned to play the clarinet at school.

by lscamander November 5, 2012

i learnt the clarinet at school

I give a great blowjob

"Can you do anything?!?"
"I learnt the clarinet at school...."

by 7947568 July 7, 2016

Virtual High Tea Coffee n Cakes and a bit of Clarinet Chit Chat

"Virtual High Tea coffee n cakes and a bit of Clarinet Chit Chat", is the name of INWIRA's YOUTUBE CHANNEL...

Joe Bloggs to his friend: "You should see this YouTube channel video about some womans clarinet practice.
Joe bloggs friend: "What's it called; the channel?"
Joe bloggs: "Virtual High Tea coffee n cakes and a bit of Clarinet Chit Chat".
Joe Bloggs friend: "Cool."

by Usebleach January 17, 2021

Pork clarinet

a penis

"I'm going home to watch porn. I'll play a tune on my pork clarinet."

by IvorBiggunFan March 23, 2024

ghetto clarinet

A sex act in which a man inserts a kazoo into his rectum while his partner takes the tip of the man's penis into his or her mouth and mimes playing a clarinet. The man should do his best to fart out a tune while making sure not to shit into the kazoo.

Did you see Tara at last night's party? She played 'Oh When the Saints Go Marching In' on Billy's ghetto clarinet.

by Smelly Randolph March 17, 2016

blown out clarinet

An STD, named after anyone that was in a marching band. Symptoms include itchiness, red spots, anal leakage, breast tissue growth and listening to Neil Diamond on repeat for days at a time. Unfortunately no treatment at this time is available except for palliative care including cool baths in oatmeal, listening to Kenny G, and always double bagging it.

Girl 1: oh shit, green eyes and blonde hair, AND he knows fingering techniques?
Girl 2: Dont Lisa, last I heard, he was receiving treatment for a 'blown out clarinet'.

by HM Barber February 22, 2019