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WEAPONS GRADE AMATUER

A fool, an idiot, a blunderer, someone who plays the game when they really should be in the grandstand.
We auditioned a couple of drummers yesterday. The second guy was alright, but the first was a weapons grade amatuer.
by black flag May 31, 2004
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Amateuristic

the characteristics of being a complete amateur at a task.
How Amateuristic
by SirDrez January 20, 2011
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Amateur

Someone who has done something one time before, defines itself as an expert on the topic.
John: Got laid?
Nick: Yeah.
John: Satisfaction granted?
Nick: Hell yeah, going like a pro like always!!
John: Yeha, like a grand master...
Nick: I'm no amateur.
by bongholmes September 21, 2012
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Amateurstitute

Having all of the properties of a prostitute except receiving no pay for their services. Thus retaining their status to compete in the slut Olympics. Their passion for their sport and disregard for monetary gains or personal health are an inspiration to aspiring whores and preteen make-out bandits everywhere.
example 1
guy 1: dude, that must have been one expensive night.

guy 2: No, that girl wasn't pro, she's still an amateurstitute. Only cost me a cab ride home and most of my dignity...

example 2

guy to locker room: Man, there was no distinguishing that amateurstitute from an "A" list porn star she did e-v-r-y-thing. I'm talking Dog in a bathtub, donkey punch, Cleveland steamer and I finished with an angry pirate!
by Big Pasta September 11, 2009
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Doing a Matt

When you are out of your depth on a course and dont want to make yourself look a bigger cunt than you already are so you make an excuse to leave, like a dusty carpet or a dirty bathroom.
He's doing a Matt.
Leave that cunt to it he's doing a Matt.
Cheeky cunts just done a matt
by Whizzeranchips October 13, 2019
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Dirty D'Amato

If you're a thoracic surgeon, and after the patient is asleep, you penetrate them anally, and then take a shit inside their open chest.
The doctor hated the patient so much that he pulled a dirty D'Amato, and they died.
by Cardone69 December 10, 2009
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Amateur karate

An emotional position of defence adopted when a person is overcome by a mixture of feelings (eg. fear, grief, distrust, love, lust) towards another person. As a result of feeling overwhelmed by the person who adopts the "amateur karate" position does so in an attempt to make the other person give up and go away with the express outcome of appearing strong and without revealing any feelings. If they stopped adopting the amateur karate position the person would reveal vulnerable feelings which would make them feel unbearably weak, needy and human.
two ex-partners meet 10 years after seperating....

Petula: why did you not contact me when i rang you and wrote letters, and when i did speak to you you just told me how much you were enjoying your job as a film producer and didn't talk about how you felt?

Darryl: i was young. It was "amateur karate". I couldnt tell you how much it hurt when you left me. It hurt too much.
by thereoncewasanuglyduckling September 7, 2009
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