A contract written to protect people from falling into the bottomless hole of simpery. The contract includes ten injunctions. These are as such:
I. Thou shalt not spend money on the object of simpery.
II. Thou shalt not ship the object of simpery with thine self.
III. Thou shalt not lay thine eyes on fanfictions or shippy fanart.
IV. Thou shalt not browse pictures of the object of simpery for more than ten minutes a day.
V. Thou shalt not watch more than thirty minutes of videos of the object of simpery a day.
VI. Thou shalt not gush about the object of simping on thy social media.
VII. Thou shalt not show any emotion towards the object of simping.
VIII. Thou shalt not say cheesy, cringey, corny, or crusty things about the members.
IX. Thou shalt not have more than ten pictures of the object of simpery at a time. Thou shalt also not have a single shirtless or sexy picture of them.
X. Thou shalt not become an egg--smooth-brained, hairless, and lacking of common sense.
Each injunction comes with a respective punishment.
I. Thou shalt not spend money on the object of simpery.
II. Thou shalt not ship the object of simpery with thine self.
III. Thou shalt not lay thine eyes on fanfictions or shippy fanart.
IV. Thou shalt not browse pictures of the object of simpery for more than ten minutes a day.
V. Thou shalt not watch more than thirty minutes of videos of the object of simpery a day.
VI. Thou shalt not gush about the object of simping on thy social media.
VII. Thou shalt not show any emotion towards the object of simping.
VIII. Thou shalt not say cheesy, cringey, corny, or crusty things about the members.
IX. Thou shalt not have more than ten pictures of the object of simpery at a time. Thou shalt also not have a single shirtless or sexy picture of them.
X. Thou shalt not become an egg--smooth-brained, hairless, and lacking of common sense.
Each injunction comes with a respective punishment.
Mike: "Dude, I signed the simp contract yesterday and I've never felt so protected in my life! It's like a form of insurance so I won't fall into the shame of simping ever again."
Jimmy: "It's too late for me, man. I already broke three of the rules and now I'm going to get punished for being a simp."
Jimmy: "It's too late for me, man. I already broke three of the rules and now I'm going to get punished for being a simp."
by eyelidlash July 20, 2021
Get the simp contract mug.Simp: "OMG! Have you seen Hyunjin's blond hair? He's just so hot with them!"
Anti-simp police: "This right here is a classic case of simping hair."
Anti-simp police: "This right here is a classic case of simping hair."
by idedicatemyentirelifetoJesus August 30, 2021
Get the Simping hair mug.(1) A person who acts like the police to arrest simps. (2) A simp who is afraid that another simp will simp for the person they simp for so they "arrest" them.
by names-epicc June 6, 2021
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Rio is the worlds biggest coffee simp. Luckily, she knows how to turn it on first thing every morning to get the day started off right.
by Handy_manny69 December 23, 2020
Get the Coffee Simp mug.by Jetmouse3000 January 2, 2021
Get the Fleet Simp mug.First of all, who is hawks?
Hawks is the number 2 hero in the anime mha, he is one of the most talented, beautiful, smart, cute, sexy, perfect, delicious character to exist.
Second, what are the hawks simps?
Hawks simps are one of the most loving and caring person you’ll meet, they are so vulnerable and cute, they know everything about this man, no matter what you ask them, they know everything so don’t dare disrespect their mans or they’ll come for your soul.
Whether you kin, stan, or just think about this man...you are the most perfect version of a human, you scrumptious, delicious, beautiful piece of human..I respect you and love you :)
Hawks is the number 2 hero in the anime mha, he is one of the most talented, beautiful, smart, cute, sexy, perfect, delicious character to exist.
Second, what are the hawks simps?
Hawks simps are one of the most loving and caring person you’ll meet, they are so vulnerable and cute, they know everything about this man, no matter what you ask them, they know everything so don’t dare disrespect their mans or they’ll come for your soul.
Whether you kin, stan, or just think about this man...you are the most perfect version of a human, you scrumptious, delicious, beautiful piece of human..I respect you and love you :)
by hawkslittlehelper January 10, 2021
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