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Lesbian Jesus

An ethereal being, If you find a hot gay being, There is a chance that they are Lesbian Jesus. They lord over and watch over gays. You will know you have met Lesbian Jesus if they bless your fucking soul by saying "Gay gay homosexual gay." NOT ALL GAYS ARE LESBIAN JESUS.
Gay #1: ITS LESBIAN FUCKING JESUS
Gay #2: FUCK WE GOTTA BOW

Lesbian jesus is a gay being
by Lesbianjesusfolower#582 June 28, 2023
mugGet the Lesbian Jesusmug.

Jesus Crust

He is the son of Crust God. He was crucified for our memes and came back on the 3rd day to teach his diciples to spread the teachings Crust. Never touch his sock because if you do he will anally rape with a stick while screechingREEEEEEEEEEE!”
I pray to thee, our lord Jesus Crust.
by Jesus Crust May 23, 2018
mugGet the Jesus Crustmug.

Pulling a Jesus

When someone on chat says "BRB" and doesn't return for days.
Buddy: Hey bro, brb.
Friend: Aight, I'll be waiting
*3 days pass*
Buddy: Oh hey dude, i'm back, wassup?
Friend: DUDE, IT'S ALREADY THURSDAY, NICE JOB PULLING A JESUS!
by userbrn May 19, 2011
mugGet the Pulling a Jesusmug.

Jesus Handles

The handles inside a car by the seats that be hung on to when swerving around tight corners and yelling "JESUS!"
Alice hung on with all her might to the Jesus Handles and yelled the accompanying expression as Luke took a tight corner.
by Indigo Starr March 5, 2010
mugGet the Jesus Handlesmug.

Fire Jesus

Fire Jesus is essentially real Jesus with two major differences; the ability to shoot flames, and the psychotic tendency to burn Pagans. He will spend vast amounts of time simply hunting down and burning Pagans with flames that spurt from his palms.
Pagan: Man, I sure am ready for a long day of bettering my society as a whole followed by some naturalistic tree worship!

Fire Jesus: My ass you are! *shoots flames which instantly incinerate said Pagan"
by Chocolate Pudding Man September 16, 2011
mugGet the Fire Jesusmug.

Jesus Troll

A person who sobers the mood of a post by tying the subject back to Jesus/God/Christianity. Can be completed with biblical quotes or an overall feeling of Christian guilt.
Steve: Check it out, I planked the water fountain!
Terry: That shit is so fucking stupid, man
John: We should all thank Him for having the full mobility of our bodies to be able to do such things. Some people don't have that luxury.
Steve: John, you're such a Jesus Troll.
by Jonnie Brasco July 11, 2011
mugGet the Jesus Trollmug.

Jesus Jenelle

1) a common phrase when you seen wit Kieffah
2) a phrase when Jenelle screws up and doesn't take care of her baby.
3) Said when change jar in thrown at Keiffah
"Jesus Jenelle I seen you with Kieffah"

" Have fun on the streets with your boyfrieeeeeeend"

"Jesus Jenelle that was my change jaaar, why did you do that?"
by makinithailondesehoes January 1, 2012
mugGet the Jesus Jenellemug.

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