Skip to main content

Jesus Powers

noun, at least I think so. could be a noun, could be an adjective, who gives a shit. parts of speech are lame anyway.

"Jesus Powers" is the description one applies to a particular person when a particular situation has occurred that defies logic and reason. When the impossible has not only been made possible, but accomplished as well then an individual may be referred to as having Jesus Powers.
(During a late night online first-person shooter match)

Guy 1:"Dude! I shot this asshole with, like, 30 fuckin' bullets! No fuckin' way he could have survived that shit. I was lighting his ass up!"

Guy 2: "Dude's got fuckin' Jesus powers man."

(While attending a magic show)

"How does Criss Angel do that shit? Must have Jesus powers."

Guy 1: "Fuckin' Jesus powers."
by COD blows BFBC2 ROCKS September 11, 2011
mugGet the Jesus Powers mug.

Jesus FC

A term used by football enthusiasts in lieu of "Jesus Fucking Christ" whenever someone misses a really easy shot. Originally used to refer to Gabriel Jesus, but now can be used to refer to any player
Jesus FC, how does Balotelli miss that?
by j0k#r October 29, 2019
mugGet the Jesus FC mug.

Jesus butthole

What some dogs have. The two calics on each thigh are the hands and the butthole is the head. If you look at it closely, it kind of looks like Jesus at the last supper.
by ahumanbeingwhoisaperson December 3, 2020
mugGet the Jesus butthole mug.

prison Jesus

“Ones whom looks like a “prisonJesus
By golly Mr buddle, you look like prison Jesus!
by COLEPEDERSON November 4, 2022
mugGet the prison Jesus mug.

Jesus Jugs

Any fake looking bitch that claims it's all about Jesus but sins on the daily.
Hey did you see Jesus jugs over there . Her nose is so fake ,it's going to crumble like Michael Jackson's did and fall off .
by anonymous December 14, 2021
mugGet the Jesus Jugs mug.

Jesus Pizza

The biggest noob on xbox trying to be famous on youtube.
Dude Jesus Pizza is such a squeaker

That kid is so annoying , reminds me of Jesus Pizza
by AnonymousLTE October 10, 2021
mugGet the Jesus Pizza mug.

flow jesus

When a christian boy has long flowing hair.
by Flow Jesus February 26, 2022
mugGet the flow jesus mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email