Masturbate

Verb

To stroke your penis up and down until white shit comes out the top.

I masturbate every night.

by Joetherealone September 29, 2021

Masturbating

What you’re doing right now.

People masturbating make up most of Urban Dictionary’s traffic. In fact, probably the entire internet’s traffic in general.

by Your pseudonym :3 September 20, 2023

Masturbate

What the fuck is wrong with you jackoffs get a girlfriend already

I masturbate because im lonely

by 5Skin not 4Skin January 9, 2020

Intellectual Masturbation

The act of thinking, discussing, and/or philosophizing to no one’s spiritual, mental, or physical benefit, but purely for the sake of one’s own pleasure, intellectual self-satisfaction, and/or pride.

Note: Not all intellectual and philosophical discussion is intellectual masturbation, it only falls under the definition when it doesn’t benefit those in engaged in it, only harms due to wasted time and an artificial satisfaction in one’s self.

I remember when all I would do was engage in intellectual masturbation on Discord. I would use fancy words and blabber all day about philosophy, without actually applying it in any way whatsoever. I just derived pleasure from hearing myself speak about such abstract and complex subjects. What a fool I was.

by Tea76Crumpets796 October 1, 2022

masturbation

when you beat the absolute living shit out of your meat package so fucking hard, that a liquid located inside of your ballsack called "semen", "cum" or "jizz", rapidly shoots out of your penis hole at 800 miles an hour.

it can also lead to your girlfriend becoming pregnant and having children if shooting out your hot sticky jizz while your erect, fat, thick, juicy cock is located inside of her vagina/pussy.

(alone (masturbating))
guy: omagash im boutta cum a large quan-titty of kids after this daily and excessive masturbation

(with partner)
guy: oh my gosh im gonna shoot my hot cum inside of your pussy!!!!!!!11111
girl: shoot it inside of me daddy uwu

by Hypurrelet August 14, 2023

Masturbate tomorrow

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Masturbate tomorrow Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

by Zack Lazer September 27, 2018

Masturbate

To masturbate (which is also known as masturbation) is when a man or a woman stimulates their private areas for sexual sensations which provides pleasure and usually eventually causes orgasm and release.

Example 1: Sarah goes into her bedroom, locking her door before she goes to masturbate to porn/a movie on her laptop.

Example 2: Dan comes home from work when his wife isn't home and he puts on some porn or some other things and begins to masturbate.

by Black Cat - 5000 November 7, 2025