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Jesus Juicer

A person obsessed with making organic fruit juice to sell at stands near children's schools. He spends hours obsessively manufacturing sweet fruit juices, in order to get the little kids hooked on it, so he can make money to support his religious causes.
How does Jimmy contribute so much to our church? Didn't you hear? He's a Jesus Juicer.

"Mommy, why does that guy always sell juice at that stand near out school?" "Darling, you stay away from him! He's a bad Jesus Juicer".
by SultrySloth April 22, 2019
mugGet the Jesus Juicermug.

african jesus

A Black holy spirit named after a holy god Jesus
Damn that black african jesus is cute
by YJHR June 16, 2017
mugGet the african jesusmug.

Jesus butthole

What some dogs have. The two calics on each thigh are the hands and the butthole is the head. If you look at it closely, it kind of looks like Jesus at the last supper.
by ahumanbeingwhoisaperson December 3, 2020
mugGet the Jesus buttholemug.

Jesus Powers

noun, at least I think so. could be a noun, could be an adjective, who gives a shit. parts of speech are lame anyway.

"Jesus Powers" is the description one applies to a particular person when a particular situation has occurred that defies logic and reason. When the impossible has not only been made possible, but accomplished as well then an individual may be referred to as having Jesus Powers.
(During a late night online first-person shooter match)

Guy 1:"Dude! I shot this asshole with, like, 30 fuckin' bullets! No fuckin' way he could have survived that shit. I was lighting his ass up!"

Guy 2: "Dude's got fuckin' Jesus powers man."

(While attending a magic show)

"How does Criss Angel do that shit? Must have Jesus powers."

Guy 1: "Fuckin' Jesus powers."
by COD blows BFBC2 ROCKS September 11, 2011
mugGet the Jesus Powersmug.

Jesus sandals

Sandals in which are usually leather and have two straps in front and back.
Look at her, she's wearing Jesus sandals.
by Annie anymous September 10, 2016
mugGet the Jesus sandalsmug.

Jesus FC

A term used by football enthusiasts in lieu of "Jesus Fucking Christ" whenever someone misses a really easy shot. Originally used to refer to Gabriel Jesus, but now can be used to refer to any player
Jesus FC, how does Balotelli miss that?
by j0k#r October 29, 2019
mugGet the Jesus FCmug.

Cup Of Jesus

Looks like this is going to be a crazy day today I need a cup of Jesus
by Random Chick June 6, 2015
mugGet the Cup Of Jesusmug.

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