Clapped tortoise

When someone is so clapped that they look worse than a tortoise

Abbie is a clapped tortoise

by Sandleradam20 June 15, 2021

Transylvanian tortoise

Transylvanian tortoise (noun, friendly insult/light insult)
A person from Transylvania (ardelean) who is extremely slow in speech, decisions or actions – speaks slowly, stalls for time with "no, las' că...", "fain, da' stai nițel..." or prolonged "băi...", annoying those in a hurry around. Combines the stereotype of the calm and philosophical Transylvanian with the image of the tortoise (tortoise), the slowest but most steadfast animal.
(Approximate Romanian equivalent: "ardelean târâgănat" or "melc transilvănean".)
Approximate pronunciation: /træn.sɪlˈveɪ.ni.ən ˈtɔ r.təs/

Example usage in sentences (in English, to sound authentic):

"Hurry up, you Transylvanian tortoise! The movie starts in five minutes!"
"Stop explaining everything so slowly, don't be such a Transylvanian tortoise."You're driving like a Transylvanian tortoise – step on the gas!"

by Dreamyshark January 3, 2026

wheezing tortoise

someone who shot an ostrich in the last 34 minutes

he is a wheezing tortoise

by Human who is also an ostrich June 24, 2022

Roller skating tortoise

When the golden brown tortoise appears without announcement. Leading to shit yourself issues.

I was happily talking to this hot girl and the roller skating tortoise arrived

by Stenhousemuir nill February 26, 2022