crush management

When the object of an unrequited crush tries to maintain friendly ties with the smitten party without selfishly leading him/her on.

When L. realized he was on the receiving end of some world-class crush management, he was hurt of course, but appreciated J.'s thoughtfullness.

by gwood99 August 1, 2008

mcdonald manager diagnosis

when you pass out in the bathroom of a mcdonald's bathroom, and the manager finds you on the floor shivering.

1. hello, sir. i am the manager at mcdonald's. you are dehydrated and are laying out cold on my bathroom floor.

2. hey, that's my dad. he passed out because he won't drink his ensure.

3. hey, you clowns. you're talking about me. i will not drink ensure because i hate fat people, and i don't want to get fat again!!!

4. if you're ill, please go to mcdonald's to get youself a top of the line mcdonald manager diagnosis.

by MCDONALD'S MANAGER December 6, 2012

Account Manager

What an employer will post in a job description, trying to make some job look like an awesome, experience-gaining, entry-level beginning to a wonderful career in Marketing techniques, strategies, and problem-solving, and all with competitive salary. When in reality, it's being a door-to-door salesman or a telesaleman making cold calls all day with commission-based pay.

IMMEDIATE JOB OPENING FOR ACCOUNT MANAGER
Run in a local office near you. COMPETITIVE PAY. NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY.
Work for a great company, gain skills in marketing techniques, problem-solving and working as a team an alone, competitive pay + bonuses. I SWEAR THIS IS A GREAT JOB.

by j_ballin April 7, 2015

Ouija-board management

A style of management whereby the project as a whole is slowly moving in one direction or another, but when asked who is in charge (and by extension who is to blame for the slow progress) all hands come off the board, all progress stops and no one individual is to blame.

When asked how the new project was going Joe replied "With the Ouija-board management going on I am surprised we have accomplished this much"

by Conroe100 September 23, 2017

Team Manager

A person whose talent didn't get them far enough to make the team so they subside to team manager. They have to be at games and practices just to wear the gear and look like total posers.

Girl: Wow, is he on the team?

Guy: Nah, hes just team manager...
Girl: Oh...

by lovewithsky June 28, 2010

Stage Manager

The person that is below the director in terms of superiority. Generally one of the people with a headset. He/she will be at rehearsals to run them if the director is busy. He/she is generally a nice person unless you piss them off. They are the ones responsible for calling cues during a show, pulling the curtain, sometimes moving set pieces. Without him/her and the rest of the stage crew there wouldn't be a show.

Where did the stage manager go? We need someone to run rehearsal..

by Hello! Goodbye! August 4, 2012

Business Relationship Manager

The Epitome of the Idle, Cock Sure Useless Manager's within the IT Industry. Abilties include a total lack of knowledge of the architecture they are supporting, sitting comfortably with a high degree of arrogance and total lack of respect for the people actually doing the required work. Recognizable by the total lack of any pro-active abilties, often identifiable by the fact they only appear when an issue occurs for the customer they look after, and thereafter show the "Follow the Ball" syndrome until some poor bastard end up with the thankless task of sorting out the problem. They will then set up camp behind said person, haranguing the person with inane stupid questions until
a) Problem is resolved
b) Resolver cannot take anymore and guns down entire office with a AK 47 .
Sometimes know under the guise of Partner Services Manager or Service Delivery Manager

"Hey Jack, theres a High Priority Case Just been raised"

"Shit, Head's Down, there's a BRM turned up and he looks like he's up for a ball chasing session"

BRM: Business Relationship Manager

by Rockaroundtheclock1972 November 22, 2009