black cactus

Black cactus is a crazy killing machine that destroys everything in its path. Except Popsicle sticks 🌵
He is the highest ranked player in this lobby. he must be a black cactus.
by Beg4Hegg January 22, 2015
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Cactus Bombs

When Mike Gordon of Phish is on an extended jam dropping funky sexy bass grooves.
Woah Teddy, Did you hear that Tube from 12/29/97? Mike was dropping Cactus bombs all over that track
by RyGuy88140 April 03, 2015
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Boner Cactus

When you cock grows small pointy hairs all over it and resemble's a tall cactus
DUDE! I think jeffy has BONER CACTUS.

OMG no way.
by Hitler's cat April 30, 2009
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cactus ass

A prickly, fiery burning in the rectal cavity during the act of defecation, as though one were passing a cactus through the colon.
Remind me not to get the Inferno Burger next time we go out to eat; that gave me mad cactus ass.
by Dodger of Zion November 16, 2010
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cactus dance

Tasteless dance moves used to: a) completely ruin a friendly gathering, b) scare off predators, and c) summon demons.

A proper cactus dance can be described as standing as awkwardly straight as possible, bending the elbows at 90 degrees (much like a large cactus), and facing knees in the same direction, also heavily bent. You want to retain the position as closely as possible while flailing the arms and shifting the hips so the knees sway back and forth.

While executing these moves, just remember nobody brings it like you do. This dance successfully ends when the dancer is hit over the head with a heavy blunt object.
a) "Mary, your son is doing the cactus dance again..."

b) "Beware, I know the cactus dance."

c) Zach: "Darren, I really don't think its working."
Darren: "Just give me a another hour, we'll be having beers with Nosferatu in no time."
*WHACK*
by Mungman November 22, 2007
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Sitting on the cactus

When you do something so undersireable it's akin to sitting, bare assed, on a spiky plant (typically a cactus).
I sat on the cactus last night trying to catch up on the book. OR I was sitting on the cactus for 3 hours trying to finish that movie.
by S.O.K March 07, 2009
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cactus nuts

When the hair on your ball-sac starts growing back several days after shaving it, usually causing itching and irritation.
Adam: Why do you keep scratching your junk?
Ben: I got cactus nuts dude, my sac is torn up!
by benzo11 November 14, 2006
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