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Ethical masturbation

Ethical masturbation does NOT refer to a literal act of masturbation performed ethically, rather, it refers to an act of self loathing and self deprecation done with the goal to ease one's mind, it is often done as follows (conversation example):

Ethical masturbator: oh no, big bad me did a big bad thing
a normal person: maybe do something about it, then?
Ethical masturbator: no, I will just sit here and talk myself down so that I feel like I have been true to myself and so I won't feel guilty about something-bad-that-I-did/something-bad-that-just-happened-on-it's-own even despite the fact that I did nothing to fix it.

another form of Ethical masturbation is doing the same exact thing but rather than just indulging in self-loathing, one might also start asking supernatural entities (gods, spirits, ETC) for forgiveness
just saying that you are bad won't fix things, it's not remorse - it's Ethical masturbation
by Leo of the Харків December 28, 2024
mugGet the Ethical masturbationmug.

masturbation

for horny bitches:
i heard my parents car finally leave the drive, running to the draw filled with dildos and lube. i ripped off my clothes until all that was left was my thong. i gently started to rub my pussy, feeling instant relief and wanting more. i ripped off my panties, enjoying it even more raw. the more i rubbed, the more vigorous i got. it was throbbing now, begging for those fingers to slide right in. i moaned at the thought of it, inserting my middle finger into my clit, pounding it in and out. but 1 wasnt enough, my index finger slid in along with my middle finger going as deep as i could. cum building up, rubbing and fingering myself even harder to the point my legs were shaking. the adrenaline was insane, building up until i moaned so loud my throat hurt. i couldnt stop moaning, it just felt so good. i needed more, i craved more. i slammed my draw open and pulled out my dildo. i placed it facing upwards on my floor and yanked my fingers out of my pussy. i started to bounce on it, turning into aggressively riding it and pumping it into my body. god it felt so good. my pussy was dripping wet. i could feel the cum about to leave my body, clenching to not finger myself even more. this lasted a few seconds before it squirted out of me, launching across the room and landing on my door, dripping down. the moan that came out of me was the best one yet. i couldn't help but rub my pussy even more until my brother came in my room. not realising he was home, he said
"no need for masturbation, i can help with that"
by sw@ggyp0tat0es February 22, 2024
mugGet the masturbationmug.

masturbating

Robert loved masturbating. Every day after school, he would go in his room, lock the door, and go on Jerkmate. He would pull down his pants and underpants and click on the perfect stream. When he saw the girl rub the dildo on her massive tits, he started masturbating his dick. Then when she got to shoving the dildo up her asshole, Robert would start masturbating even faster. At this point, his dick was covered in precum. Now, the girl was shoving the dildo up her pussy. Robert was masturbating even harder, his hands getting tired, but he still perservered. He felt the cum getting to the head. Finally, Robert let a big moan as he cummed all over under the desk. Robert felt like he could jizz one more time, so he continued beating his meat as he clicked on another live stream. Robert, being the gooner that he is, ejactulated again, this time not white, but a pinkish-red color. He was horrified. He then died after peeing all of his blood out.
by MyCockIsBigAndBlack October 5, 2025
mugGet the masturbatingmug.

masturbate

I would masturbate all night
by qqqqqqqqrrrrrrrr November 14, 2021
mugGet the masturbatemug.

tactical masturbation

It's a term for masturbating (or busting a nut) before meeting a girl or going on a date. Now.. how is it useful? Well it helps you to think with your brain and not with your dick.
My friend: Bro.... I made a mistake. I accidentally did the deeds with Lily...

Me: God damn Lily???? Bro you really should have tactical masturbation
by Harsit2006 December 29, 2023
mugGet the tactical masturbationmug.

masturbation betrayal

When you and a partner agree not to masturbate until a certain date but they do it anyway and make you aware of them breaking the promise.
David: “Gonna beat my meat, gonna beat my meat
Me: “David!! That’s masturbation betrayal!”
by Spittingstraightfacts January 2, 2020
mugGet the masturbation betrayalmug.

must masturbate may

something that does not exist like your dad
Joe "When is must masturbate may?"
Jeff "When your dad comes back."
Joe cries
by IDK BUT YOUR MUM IS GAY November 21, 2022
mugGet the must masturbate maymug.

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