Dildo

Dildo is a sex toy made out of plastic or silicon and it represents a penis. It is used mostly by younger women (and some gay guys idk lol) and its purpose is to sexually satisfy, whether it's anal, vaginal or oral satisfaction. Plural form of the word 'dildo' still remains unknown to humanity, so you should just choose which one would you like to use: dildoes, dildos or dildees. Also, it is worth mentioning that if your friends see that you have a dildo or you straight up tell them that you have a dildo, you might get weird looks. Depends on who your friends are. And it also depends on your gender. If you are male, you will get disgusted looks. But again, depends on who your friends are. And for the love of God, hide that dildo you got from your family members, cause if they notice, you will have an awkward life.

Grandma: *enters your room* Oh my lovely child! Your grandma brought you some cookies and an apple pie, your favourite!
You: Aww, thanks Grandma, you are the best!
Grandma: So how are you?
You: Well, you know, casual, I got a job recently, I'm trying my best there.
Grandma: That's really good! *looks around your room* You are still keeping that teddy bear I gave you for your 6th birthday! How lovely...
You: Yeah...
Grandma: Oh, and what's that purple thing you got there next to your teddy bear? I can't really see, let me get my glasses.
You: Grandma no.
Grandma: *puts on glasses* Alright, let's see...
You: Grandma, seriously don't.
Grandma:*realizes that you have a fucking dildo in your possession*
- You stare there awkwardly, silently letting out a *sigh* as you proceed to live a very awkward life, as you know that moment will haunt you forever. Grandma's eyes get wide and they roll up, she falls down, and proceeds to have a heart attack, stroke, and a seizure. All at the same time.
Your life just became a huge disappointment...

by LeMurko April 28, 2020

Kiss Me On The Mouth And Call Me Dildo

those who are kissed on the mouth and a called a Dildo

you: "At this point... just kiss me on the mouth and call me dildo."

by Guesseppe October 17, 2025

dildo date

when one person is as old as another one was at a certain time

your friend who's 786 days older than you: on february 17th, 2021 i was the same exact age as you are now. that is our dildo date.
you: woah.

by Wissy Pissy April 14, 2023

Donkey Dildo

Something that sucks so abysmally bad that there really isn't any other way to describe just how large of a fuckup the situation is.

> unfathomable turmoil currently present
"This situation sucks donkey dildo!"
> ranked teammates tank the entire team for being generationally washed
"My lobby sucks donkey dildo!"
> raining outside, no coat, cold as fuck, windy
"This weather right now sucks donkey balls!"

by Tbblobnoern November 22, 2025

dull dildo

When a dildo has become used too many times, aka the dick isn’t as hard as it used to be

“Kelly don’t use that one; it’s a dull dildo!”

by Chlorine xoxo September 24, 2017

Dildo

Something your mom uses at night when their sleeping 💦🍆

Mom stop using your dildo🍆🍆🍆🍆

by Yourdadsgirlfriend February 25, 2022

kentucky dildo derby

When you and your 5 closest pals go to the local high school track and have a relay race but instead of using a baton, you use a dildo. The beginner must start with the dildo in his ass and pass it to the next guy by inserting it into his ass himself and so forth until the last runner makes it back.

I'm still sore from that Kentucky Dildo Derby last week.

by PeterPoot69 July 8, 2017