Shrodinger's Fap

An allegory for a terrible willy wankin' addiction. At any given point you are either fapping or not fapping. Like you're the cat and fapping is the poison

Paul: "I've been thinking about titties all morning. Man, it feels like at any time I could break down and fap"

Pattrick: "I'd hate to joke about your troubles, but it'd be pretty funny if we called that Shrodinger's Fap"

by Founder of Shrodinger's Fap April 29, 2022

Croatian flappy fap

When an average Croatian female gets inslired by flapoy bird and decides that normal fapping just wont do. Sh eprezends she is rhe bird in flappy bird, and does the Croatian flappy fap.

"I was just talking to my friend, and she suddenly started spinning!"
"Is she Croatian?"
"Yes"
"She was doing the Croatian flappy fap."

by yourmkmsm July 24, 2022

Choke and Fap

Another term to describe autoerotic asphyxiation, yet specifically when one is alone.

Neville could not find his belt after he had a choke and fap

by No Cure for Stupid People January 24, 2023

Map it and Fap it

1. the act of google-mapping the address of your crush's house (Mapping it) and proceeding to beat off outside her window. (Fapping it)

2. The shy guy's alternative to Mark it and Park it

EX:
poor johnny was just too shy to try and pick up lisa at the bar so he decided to map it and fap it to her.

by SavoryDavory December 18, 2012

Silent but deadly fap

A gap in which you have to silently masterbation while in the same room as someone else without getting caught

Person A "hey what were you up to last night?"
Person B "I was doing the silent but deadly fap challenge, how about you?"

by Wanna date? November 10, 2019

not even going to fap

A phrase that is sure to replace the widely used ”not (even) gonna lie”

Random dude: yo that thot really did send a dickpic instead of her tits accidentally
Me, an intellectual: that’s kinda cringe, not EVEN going to fap (well, ofc I’m gonna fap)

by overheadsnocap September 14, 2019